Banner Year
by robbiepoo2341
Summary: Now that Clint is finally training to be a hero, he's impatient to get past training into, well, actual hero work. But while he might not be officially on any teams, he's already making a difference standing up for people that others want to use up. And to his dad's surprise, that includes the Hulk!
1. Let's Work Together

**A/N: Okay, I know it took me forever to get this up, but it's here now, yay! For those of you that are new, this is part of a series, so you're going to want to check out my profile for the reading order of the 495 ;)**

**For the rest of you... let's go!**

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**Chapter One: Let's Work Together, Yeah, Yeah, Yeah**

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Clint had eventually worn Scott down, with Jean's help, into a compromise on training to become an X-Man. The deal was that, now that he was eleven, he could _train_, but he wasn't allowed on the team yet. But he got to be in all the right classes at the school this semester, _and _he was even working on Steve to try to get him to do some Avenger-focused stuff on weekends, since he and the other kids liked to go to the tower with Billy and Teddy when school wasn't in session.

Clint was pretty sure the argument that had won Scott over was the fact that the bad guys were coming after him _anyways_, but that had also maybe sort of prompted all the adults to get their heads together on figuring out what to do about the department creeps. Ever since Clint had gotten shot, the Avengers and the X-Men and even some other hero friends of theirs were digging into the department and uprooting projects left and right.

It was almost funny, because watching Steve go on the warpath was cool, but watching him gripe about how he hated being the one the team elected to go deal with _politicians _was even funnier.

"You're just so good at giving speeches," Tony had teased him, which got Steve to give him the dirtiest look ever on the way out the door. Tony laughed, shook his head, and then went back to what he was doing — giving K and Logan an overview of what the department had on their family. The _whole _family. There had even been information on the kids that didn't have powers but could be used as collateral.

No one was happy about it, but the people looking into it were particularly mad about the focus on James, who wasn't even a year old yet. And Clint would very much like for his little brother to make it to his first ever birthday party without bad guys getting involved.

"So what's your solution, tall, Stark, and handsome?" K asked — unable to _not _pick on him when the opportunity arose.

Tony smirked her way. "What, you mean besides the full court press?" he teased right back. "We've got Cap chewing up politicians, we've got the best minds in the world destroying their research before they can even save it on their computers—"

"That doesn't seem like a full court press to me," she said. "I want to know what the plan is when they inevitably decide to go around the legal channels they've been hiding in."

"Oh, that's the part where we destroy them," Tony said without missing a beat. "We can't touch the _legal _stuff, but once they come out of their holes?"

K shook her head at that, smirking crookedly. "And how are you gonna do that?"

"You want a sneak peek? I mean, it'll start with sparring, but we'll see where it ends up…"

"If you think you can fight them back with injuries ...I'm game."

"Mom, seriously?" Clint groaned.

"He's the one that wants me to interrogate him," K said. "Since he won't just _tell me _what the plan is, I can get it out of him the hard way."

"Try and have a little fun," Tony said, holding up both hands in a gesture of peace.

"Still didn't say 'no,'" K said, smiling now.

"Hey, as much as I'm into you and me and a dark room…"

"You're scared," she said. "And I don't need a dark room, thanks."

"Fer christsakes, just tell her what the hell you have in mind," Logan grumbled. "Because you're talkin' about two entirely different things, and I know for a fact she wants practice on interrogation before she gets a hold of one of these department idiots."

"Now _that _is a threat," Tony said, shaking his head. "But honestly, once these guys cross the legal lines the Avengers can't cross? We're sending Thor and Carol for an _opener_."

"You're opening with Thor?"

"He's pretty pissed off about the whole thing, actually," Tony said. "Something about how 'this is what happens when I leave Midgard' and how if Clint keeps getting in trouble, his _brother _is going to get involved. Guy has a thing for keeping adopted kids safe, y'know? Not _entirely _sure how I feel about it, but I think I'd wish Loki on my worst enemies, yeah."

"Does that mean I get to play with Loki too?" K asked with a grin. "Because that could be fun…"

"Could be," Tony said.

"I'm kind of okay with nothing happening to me that makes him mad enough to come," Clint chimed in. He wasn't technically _invited _to the strategy session, but no one had kicked him out thus far, so he was going to put his two cents in.

"Obviously, I'd prefer we didn't _need _him involved," K said. "But it could still be _fun_."

"Yeah, well, anyway, that's two Asgardians and Carol, not to mention the rest of the team," Tony listed off. "And Cyclops already said the X-Men would step in where SHIELD won't let the Avengers."

Logan made his way toward where K was seated, only pausing to slap Bruce Banner on the back — _hard_. "Why don't you just drop Banner on 'em?" he said with a smirk. "Seems like a better strategy than makin' Carol break a nail."

Bruce narrowed his eyes and pointedly moved away from Logan. "That's not happening."

"What's wrong? Afraid to stretch a little?" Logan asked, smirking crookedly.

"Little bit dicey, actually," Tony put in. "Ross has been poking his nose in again."

"So drop him on the department and I'll deal with Ross. Guy's a pain anyhow," Logan said as he lifted his mug.

Clint leaned forward. "Who's Ross?" he asked, genuinely curious.

"Power-hungry general," Logan summarized. "Wants to get his hands on ol' Brucey here." He accentuated the point with another hard slap on Bruce's shoulder that had him jumping just a bit.

Clint frowned, his nose scrunched up as he looked between an obviously annoyed-looking Bruce and a too-entertained Logan. "So… like the department wants you?"

"In a manner of speaking," Bruce said as he shrugged Logan's hand off and glared harder at him. "Stop that."

"Make me," Logan replied, though that was enough to get Tony to get between the two of them and give Bruce a clear exit _away _from Logan.

"Not. Smart," Tony said.

"When was the last time you let loose, Banner?" Logan asked. "Can't be smart to let it bottle up like that. Gettin' twitchy."

"_Smell the testosterone_," Carol whispered to K as Bruce glared at Logan for an answer.

"Logan just wants a good brawl," K said as if that was perfectly normal behavior.

"And with the department staying underground…" Carol surmised.

"And Sabretooth dead," K continued, though she left the statement hanging for a moment. "Something will snap."

"Then go find Ross," Carol suggested. "That actually wasn't a bad suggestion."

"Except for the part that if they're prepared for the Hulk, they should be able to catch my sweetheart too," K said. "Subtle isn't usually his strong point. If _we_ take out Ross, _he_ gets to hang back with James."

"Oh darn. That sounds so terrible for everyone involved," Carol deadpanned.

"I know. Pesky missions with the girls doing fun things. Oh no!"

"Just wait until your girls are big enough to come too," Carol laughed. "Katie was telling me this morning we have to not destroy all the Hydra bad guys until she's old enough to help."

"Which is great, because with the guys running things, you know we'll have plenty of Hydra for her when she's old enough," K replied without missing a step. "They can say they did it on purpose."

Carol laughed outright. "Seriously. Remind me why the X-Men have you around more than we do? You're _way _too much fun for them to hog."

"Because Tony would _cry _daily if I was here all the time."

"I see no problem with that."

"Well, in that case …" K smiled her way. "I mean … you did say you had a chance of bringing me a God of Mischief to play with too …"

"I know. We have all the perks," Carol chuckled. "Only thing missing is that school." She snapped her fingers. "Darn."

"In the words of the great poet Alice Cooper …" K started to say. "School's out for summer. School's out _forever._"

Carol grinned even wider, nodding along to every word while the boys continued their back and forth discussion. It was getting to a point where Tony was actively trying to keep Logan and Bruce apart when Carol spoke up. "It's decided, then."

"Wait, what?" Clint looked between the girls and the guys, obviously not sure which was the more interesting watch.

"Your mom and I are going to do a little recon," Carol said. "And the guys can stay here and try to _get it together_."

"I want to come," Clint said quickly. "I've got it together!"

"Sweetheart, we're infiltrating a military facility. You should babysit your dad and brother," K said. She wasn't turning him down outright, not when she knew his protective drive was high and he was itching to be a hero, but she wasn't going to let him get involved in anything he wasn't ready for, either.

"But Dad's trying to pick a fight with the Hulk, and I'm not _allowed_!"

"Not the first time he's done that," K said as Carol nodded in agreement. "If we could bring Dr. Banner with us without getting caught by the gamma he emits, we would."

"So while you boys get out the rulers, we'll get things done," Carol said, one arm around K's shoulders. "See ya!"

The two of them headed out, and Clint rolled his eyes and turned to Logan. "I can't wait to be thirteen. I hate getting left behind."

"Truth be told, even if you were thirteen, they still wouldn't let you go," Logan told him. "Hell, they wouldn't let half of either team go on this one."

Clint grumbled to himself and crossed his arms as he leaned against the wall. "Still hate it. I can keep up. I can heal like you now."

"Yeah, but you noticed they didn't ask me to go either, right?" Logan said. "Even when I'm pickin' on Banner."

"Yeah, but I figured that's because you guys were being dorks," Clint said bluntly.

"No. It's because she wants to keep it to a minimum," Logan told him. "And Carol's one hell of a backup."

"She _is _pretty awesome," Clint had to admit.

"Your mom'll be able to get out easy if it's just the two of 'em. A third would have to be able to fly on their own — and the only ones on _this _team that can fly can't sneak if their lives depended on it." He finished his statement looking at Tony — who was kind of a perfect example of how right he was.

"_Fine_," Clint said, pulling up a chair and sitting down. "Being eleven sucks."

"Being eleven doesn't _suck_," Bruce said. "How many eleven-year-olds do you know that get to hang out at Avengers Tower?"

"That's only 'cause of my parents," Clint said. "I want to _be _an Avenger and an X-Man!"

"I thought that was the plan," Bruce said with a confused look as he turned toward Tony.

"If he's still interested when he's old enough, yeah," Tony agreed.

"Ugh. I know that," Clint grumbled. "I just hate waiting."

"You know how many people _twice _your age would kill to hear that?" Bruce asked.

Clint narrowed his eyes Bruce's way and then put his head on his crossed arms, face down. "Stop being reasonable," he grumbled, which was more than entertaining to the others.

"Irritating, isn't it?" Logan said. "Bet you can rebound some Milk Duds off his forehead."

Clint picked his head up and smirked at Logan. "Too easy. Especially the green version. Too big a target."

"Nah, he's quicker'n he looks."

Clint finally snickered at that and shrugged. "Okay, where's the Milk Duds?"

"No," Tony said, stepping in front of Bruce. "You're not doing that."

"Looks like you got a volunteer," Logan said out of the corner of his mouth.

"Preliminary round before the finals," Clint said, sizing Tony up. "Mouth's too big a target, though. I'll get him in the nose." With that, he took off running, headed right for the kitchen to grab some candy — and possibly rope the other kids into the game.


	2. Size Difference

**A/N: Okay, so a quick explanation as to why this story kind of dropped off suddenly. My husband and I got a call for a little girl who we're now in the process of adopting, and it's pretty much the best thing that's ever happened to us. But it has also meant sleepless nights, lots of paperwork, and the sudden thrust in a matter of days from being just the two of us to having a newborn at home. We're finally getting our feet underneath us again, but obviously, fanfic isn't as important to me as my original fiction and my family, sorry. CC and I are still keeping the 714 going strong because we've got that written out FOREVER in advance, and she's been putting out stuff on the stories she leads, but because this one is a story where I'm running the plot... it got sidelined. Can't promise it'll get all the attention it used to get, but I can promise I'm finally getting back into it ;)**

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**Chapter Two: Size Difference**

Anyone watching Bruce Banner with all the kids following him around trying to get him to play with them could see that he wasn't entirely sure what to make of his following of ducklings — especially when Katie started chanting "quack quack" and Clint frantically shushed her.

Tony tried — he really did — to give Bruce some backup, but the final nail in the coffin when it came to stopping the kids in their quest came when Bruce made the cardinal error of telling Katie that he liked her dress. He had been trying to redirect her attention to her dresses and not him, but somehow, he had only ensured that he would remain the kids' focus for the foreseeable future.

Still, it was better than letting Logan and Bruce test each other's boundaries. Logan was obviously ready for a fight — not that Tony blamed the guy. For as much as the Howlett-Barton-Bishop family had been through lately, he'd be itching to hit something too.

Not that he thought that meant Bruce should get in the middle. He just knew where the urge came from.

Still, Tony was thankful when the crowd of kids slowly started to disperse from around Bruce, getting distracted with their own little games. Tommy was trying to entice Katie into a game of hide and seek. Katie wanted to play Defenders instead and kept insisting that Billy had to be Mr. Frank because he had dark hair, so Tommy could be "Foggy, I guess." Which Tommy didn't seem too happy about.

Katie and Tommy were just building up to an argument when they were rudely interrupted — by an explosion that knocked everyone their off their feet.

The first thing that happened in the immediate aftermath of the explosion was that Tony rushed to check on the kids. He could hear them sniffling and was worried one of them might have gotten hurt, but when the worst damage was that Billy had banged his elbow and Katie had a bruise on her knee from falling too hard, he let out a sigh of relief.

"Alright kiddos," Tony said. "Come on; we need to get out of here _quick_." He was trying to gather them up even as his AI was running numbers trying to decipher things like the structural integrity around them and who was injured and in need of help.

"Who're we fighting?" Tommy asked eagerly.

"_We_ are not fighting anyone. This is the part where we regroup and make a plan," Tony said.

"That's important too," Clint said, making his way over with Bruce, who looked slightly green, and not from nausea, though he hadn't freaked out, which Tony was counting as a good thing for the moment. "That's what I'm working on learning — remember, Katie? I was telling you how Scott said I can't be an X-Men until I learn about _plans_?"

Katie rolled her eyes toward Tony, though her desire to tease her big brother was temporarily overriding any fear over the attack. "He's _always _talking about the team, you know. It's because Scott let him do training now 'cause he keeps getting got."

"And that's what we're going to work on avoiding today," Tony said as he got them moving. He stopped and did a quick head count. "Where's the tiny one?"

Clint swivelled and frowned. "James was with Dad, but I don't see them…"

"I have him!" Jan called out. "I have him! It's good, but we should _go_."

"We can hide in the walls," Katie told Billy, grabbing his and Tommy's hands so she could lead the way. "Mom has things written in the walls so we can know where we're going, and they're kid-sized!"

"No, no no no no no nooooooo," Tony called back. "We need to go to a different building. No hiding in the walls!"

"Awww, but it's fun!" Katie pouted.

"You can hide in the walls when there's not explosions," Clint told her, trying to help. "But if there's an explosion and the wall you're in gets hit, you're not safe."

"Oh," Katie said, her eyes wide; she clearly hadn't considered that.

"It's okay, though!" Jan promised. "We'll get some more marks in the ductwork when your mom gets back. I'm _sure _she can come up with more!"

"Oooh, yes!" Katie nodded and bounced slightly, still holding onto Tommy and Billy's hands as the gaggle followed Jan and Tony out, with Bruce taking up the rear and doing what he could to make sure the kids didn't fall behind or get distracted.

"Logan's already down there," Jan said — more to Tony than the kids. "He um … he took a shortcut. He was a little mad."

"Wonder why," Tony said dryly.

"It's a mystery," Jan replied with a smile.

"It's 'cause he's _real _tired of his kids being where danger is," Katie informed Jan in a perfectly matter-of-fact tone. "He said so."

"That makes sense," Jan said. "And I have to agree, but we have to get you guys _out _of danger so he can do what needs to be done. Right?"

"I'm helping!" Katie promised, holding up the hands that were holding Tommy's and Billy's as proof.

"She's dragging," Tommy muttered, and Katie stuck her tongue out at him.

"Then don't be so slow!" she shot back, earning a noise of pure _offense _from Tommy.

James let out a noise that spoke to how unhappy he was with all the noise and the fuss going on around them, which got half the kids to focus on him for a moment anyhow. Especially since he didn't usually complain like that. But it got them all moving. Jan was half-wrapped around him and cooing to him as she tried to get him to settle down, but the upset baby's cries weren't doing Banner any _good_.

"It's okay, buddy," Jan said as she snuggled James, but it was clear he wasn't settling down as quickly as anyone would have liked. It wasn't an angry sort of cry but one that was obviously upset and confused.

"I can hold him when we get to a car or jet or something," Clint offered. "When he's crying, sometimes it works better if one of us gets him if Mom and Dad can't."

"Yeah, he still sometimes gets upset," Katie said. "Remember when Mom and Dad and Clint were gone? _I _was super upset too!"

The closer the little group got to the lower levels, the more chaos was ruling over the scene. Most of the other Avengers were trying to get the military presence outside of the building to back off — and to _stop firing _on Logan, who was worked right up into a solid rage. Kurt and Wanda were doing their level best to both keep the building from outright collapsing and to get people out that couldn't get through the wreckage and fires that were breaking out all over the building and surrounding areas.

"That's my parents," Billy told Jan in a stage whisper, his eyes wide. "We should go help them!"

"No, no," Jan said, obviously not expecting them to want to dive into a mess like this. "We have to get everyone safe! Don't you want to help with James?"

"Oh, right." Billy was frowning toward the chaos. "It's just… I want Mom and Dad to be okay too," he said, which was the moment Jan realized this was the first time Billy or Tommy had seen their parents at their _jobs_.

"Your mom and dad will be more than fine. They're going to be _amazing_ because they're heroes and they know what they're doing. But this little guy?" She tipped James so that Billy could see how upset he was. "He needs someone to watch out for him."

Billy bit his lip and then nodded seriously. "Okay. I'll watch out for him."

Which was all well and good when it came to evacuating, but to Tony's alarm, when he looked over at Bruce to check on him, the big guy didn't look so good either. His gaze was locked onto the fight down below and the soldiers around Logan, and Tony honestly wasn't sure what was bothering him more: the uniforms or the clearly enraged Wolverine.

And then James let out the tiniest whimpering cry, and that was it. The next second, the Hulk was barreling toward the fight — and didn't seem to care much if Logan or the soldiers were his target.

"Oh, wow, is that his superpower?" Billy asked at the same time Tony started swearing himself blue.

And even though Logan had been halfway baiting Banner the whole time they'd been at the tower with him, as soon as he actually started to fight him, Logan did try to get him to stop. Even if he was hitting him _hard_, too.

"Why's he fighting _Dad_?" Katie asked urgently, tugging on Tony's sleeve. "Dad's a good guy!"

"He knows that," Tony defended. "But your dad and the Hulk just… don't get along."

"But he didn't attack _us,_" Clint reasoned. "He went for the fight. So he's not _stupid_."

"No, he's not," Jan agreed. "He's just mad."

Clint nodded thoughtfully, obviously working something over, but it wasn't until Logan took a hit that knocked the two of them apart that Clint _did _anything. And then, all at once, he had rushed forward out of Jan and Tony's reach and all but skidded to a stop in front of the Hulk, complete with skinned knees and wide eyes.

"Hey, so, you're absolutely focused the wrong way. My dad isn't the bad guy here okay? The idiots with guns are. So stop making a mess and help me take 'em down!"

It was such a brazen move that no one knew what to do. Even the Hulk looked stunned, staring down at this kid who had no business taking him on but who was there all the same.

"Come on," Clint said, already turning to the fight. "I bet I can get more than you!"

And just like that, it was like a switch had been flipped, and the Hulk _grinned_, running ahead of Clint to bash a path — which had Clint cackling gleefully.

"No cheating!"

"Do we… do we do something?" Jan whispered urgently to Tony, holding onto his arm.

"What do you want to _do_?" Tony replied quietly.

Jan looked down at James in her arms. "I don't know? Something?"

"Right," Tony said in a breath. "Hey! Hawkeye! Come on, bud, we gotta get your dad out of here so your mom doesn't get mad at _all of us_."

"Five more minutes!" Clint called back in a laugh. He was _trying _to keep up with the Hulk, and to everyone's surprise, the Hulk was letting him, even if he was taking all the soldiers down before the could even look at Clint. It was actually a very effective way to get the Hulk to focus on the fight and not Logan: the big guy obviously didn't want Clint hurt but was too entertained by his enthusiasm to shut him out either.

"I'll get Logan," Tony said as the armor fired up. "Take the kids out of here; you know the place."

Jan nodded quickly, grabbing Katie's hand before she could also get in trouble — and trusting Katie to rope the Wagner-Maximoff boys into following her. Which they did.

That just left Clint and the Hulk behind. Which would have been more fun if Clint could actually fight, but at least the big guy was letting him play.

Somehow, by the time the last of the soldiers was forced to turn tail, the Hulk had scooped Clint up in the course of the fight to keep him from getting trampled underfoot, which was how a grinning Clint ended up meeting up with the other Avengers on the Hulk's shoulders.

"Any word back from Carol and K yet?" Tony asked quietly once they were well away from the 'authorities'.

Jan shook her head, her attention occupied by all of Logan and K's dramatic kids. "No… but I doubt they missed this if they're paying any attention at all."

"You're assuming they're going to listen to the news when they're covering their own tails, though," Tony pointed out.

"Those ladies can multitask. You underestimate us girls!" Jan defended.

"I'm not underestimating anything to do with them," Tony replied. "I know better."

"Smart man." Jan smirked, then waved as the Hulk set Clint down and he came running over to them.

"That was _so much fun," _Clint gasped, his face flushed with adrenaline.

"Bud, that wasn't fun; that was borderline psychotic," Tony said.

"Umm have _you _ever gotten to ride on the Hulk's shoulders? Because it _is _fun!"

"Yeah, no," Tony said, trying to direct him toward a path to exit. "That's just you."

"I knew he'd be alright if he knew who the bad guys were," Clint explained happily.

"All we'll need to do is set him up with a baby bjorn, and you'll be set to go," Tony teased. "He can cart you around in a backpack to point him the right way."

"I'm down," Clint said without missing a beat.

"Maaaaybe not," Jan said, pulling a face. "Come on, buddy. We still need to regroup after all that."

"_Right_." Clint nodded and then looked toward Logan, rushing over to check on him. "You okay? They were shooting you even _before _the Hulk showed up, so it had to be brutal, and I know it hurts getting shot just _once_…"

"I'm fine," Logan grumbled. "Just ticked off they were there at all. Shouldn'ta been."

"Yeah, they looked like, um, I mean, Tony said the Hulk's been having issues, but they looked… _department_-like."

"Department _is _a military outfit," Logan replied, honestly confused, since he thought Clint knew that much.

"Yeah, but when I was hanging out with the Hulk, they were targeting him. And I thought they were, you know, an our family problem."

"They screwed with a lot of people," Logan said. "They'd love to get a hold of your mom or me, but they sure as hell wouldn't complain if they could manage to down the Hulk, either."

Clint pulled a face and looked toward where a suddenly much smaller Banner was talking with Jan and looking rather shocked himself. "That's stupid," he said. "He's an Avenger. And he's not a mutant, so people, you know, _care_ more, as dumb as it is that people don't care about mutants, I mean."

"Except the Hulk has a history of doin' a lot of damage," Logan pointed out. "They don't care if they're scared of whoever it is."

"Huh." Clint shook his head. "Still stupid," he decided — and marched himself over to Bruce to wave and catch his attention. "You okay? I don't know about how you and the Hulk work, but I know getting shot hurts, and you got shot a few times while you were big and green."

"Oh, yeah, hi there," Bruce said haltingly. "I'm — I'm fine. Thanks." He looked from Clint over to Tony with a questioning expression. "Why is he worried again?"

"Kid followed you," Tony said as gently as he could. "Apparently, he and the Hulk get along. Which is weird when you consider his dad."

"Huh," Bruce looked just as shocked as the others at the news. "Are you sure you didn't get hurt, Clint?"

Clint gestured with his arms out wide. "Nah, I'm fine. I got singed a bit, but that healed right up, no problem. Besides, you were fighting my dad. You needed someone to remind you who the bad guys were," he said in a perfectly matter-of-fact tone. "You weren't gonna hurt me."

Bruce looked a little frustrated at the declaration. "There's no way for you to know that."

"Sure there is," Clint said, still sounding perfectly reasonable. "You didn't go crazy and hurt any of us even when we were annoying — _and _you were focused on the fight, so I knew that's where you wanted to be. You just needed reminding."

"Let him be," Logan advised. "Banner's totally different than the Hulk."

"Yeah, the Hulk's more fun," Clint said with a crooked grin. "Even if he hogged all the bad guys — even though I _told _him I could shoot 'em just fine."

"He's just like that," Logan agreed.

Clint nodded, then turned more serious as he locked gazes with Bruce again. "But really, me and my family deal with the department a _lot_. So if they come after you again, you can call us if you need to. It's not right for them to try and grab you or me or anyone."

"Clint, if they manage to catch the Hulk and get 'im back to their base, they're gonna get everything they asked for," Logan said.

"Then we can't let 'em do that," Clint said, his arms crossed before he stopped, turned, and pointed a finger at Tony. "You guys are Avengers. You should be doing something about the department! Them and anyone else who think kidnapping and forcing people to work for them is okay. That's what Avengers _do_."

"No," Logan laughed. "I mean they'll get what's comin' to 'em." He chuckled to himself. "I've seen him do real damage on those creeps before. It'd be hilarious."

Clint shook his head stubbornly. "Doesn't matter. It still shouldn't happen. I mean, you know it still hurts when you get caught. And maybe the Hulk doesn't get _stopped_, but it hurts when he gets hit. You can tell because he gets all tense and more upset when he's getting shot than when he's just frustrated."

"Uh huh," Logan said — and even went so far as to sock Banner in the shoulder as he passed him by.

"So… can we get ice cream now?" Katie cut in, looking up at Logan with her eyes wide and her long eyelashes fluttering. "There was a fight, so now there's ice cream, right?"

"As long as we get offa the street first," Logan said.

"Oh, I guess," Katie said, pouting dramatically before she grinned, spun around, and made a dash for the other Avengers. "Uncle Kurt! 'Port me to ice cream! I can't wait!"


	3. Explain Yourself, Clint

**A/N: So, I'm still pretty slow to update, but second trimester has been good to me. No promises when we get to the spring when I'm due :P**

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**Chapter 3: Explain Yourself, Clint**

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The kids were all finally coming down from adrenaline and sugar-fueled highs by the time everyone really got settled in. The Avengers wouldn't be at the tower for a while until the damage was repaired, but Tony had secondary (and tertiary) sites set up for just this kind of thing, so it didn't take too long for everyone to get relaxed and semi-comfortable.

Except, of course, for Steve, who looked like he was turning as red as his uniform when Clint saw him.

"You okay, Cap?" Clint asked, genuinely concerned.

"What were you _thinking_?" Steve started out. "You were supposed to get clear of the incident, not … _ride the Hulk into battle._"

Clint blinked, surprised by how _upset _Steve was about the whole thing, and then held his hands up in a gesture of peace. "That part wasn't my idea. The big guy didn't want to worry about stepping on me, okay?"

"You didn't have a plan going into it — and even if you _did_, you were supposed to _evacuate_."

"Yeah, but he and my dad were pounding on each other, and the soldiers were targeting them both," Clint pointed out.

"He and your Dad _always end up pounding each other_," Steve pointed out.

Clint narrowed his eyes and tipped his chin up. "Yeah, but listen to what I'm saying about how the _department soldiers were targeting them_. Somebody had to remind 'em where the fight was — or they'd end up getting grabbed soon as they wore each other down. Duh."

"That's not … Clint. That would have taken _hours_," Steve said.

"They'd already been shooting up my dad," Clint pointed out.

Steve blinked. "What are you talking about?"

"That's what the department _does _to my dad," Clint said in a frustrated tone. "They shoot him up until he can't _walk_."

Steve turned to look at Logan to corroborate, and when Logan simply shrugged in response, Steve shook his head. "That …. Why would they _do _that?" He held up one hand. "I know why the Canadians would, but why would _Ross_?"

"Dad says the Department would like to get the Hulk too, and they're part of the military too, so…" Clint shrugged openly. "I dunno. Villain teamup? Don't those things happen with you guys — or is that just in the comics from the '50s my mom let me read?"

"The Department is half in with the Americans," Logan said as he took a seat. "Thought you knew that. They've been cooperatin' since the start of the Cold War."

When Steve's frown just kept growing, Clint let out a sigh. "See, this is why you and Scott were doing all that talking, I thought. Don't you know about how those guys chased me and my mom through Washington D.C. back before she was even officially my mom?"

"I thought that was just the other side," Steve admitted. "I didn't think it was our guys too."

'It's always been both, Cap," Logan said.

"And anyway, bad guys are bad guys," Clint said with a shrug. "So yeah, I saw 'em targeting my dad and the Hulk, and I don't really care how long a shot it is for them to get screwed. They're not getting screwed on my watch."

"You okay with your kid adopting Banner like that?" Steve asked after a beat, clearly trying to find some humor while he processed it all.

"Like I got a say in who he decides he likes," Logan deadpanned.

Clint grinned even wider. "The Hulk's _fun_. You just gotta know how to talk to him," he told Steve excitedly. "He's a giant goofball if you ask him to compete — and he wouldn't let me get close to danger even after I told him I'd been training with the X-Men _and _I can heal."

Steve stared at him for a long moment. "Your kid's weird, Logan."

"Pot, kettle," Logan called back. "At least he ain't wearing star-spangled pj's."

"No, but Mom got me some new long johns for Christmas Eve at the cabin," Clint said.

"She got those for everyone," Logan laughed. "More or less."

"Yeah, Katie thinks they're bunny outfits," Clint laughed.

"Say that louder and they might end up bein' bunny outfits," Logan told Clint quietly.

Clint grinned crookedly. "I'll write it on a sticky note for Mom when she gets home."

"Won't stop her callin' you duck fluff, though," Logan pointed out.

"Are you sure?" Clint asked, one eyebrow raised. "It could be _juuuust _enough of a distraction!"

Logan chuckled and messed up Clint's hair worse than it already was. "Yeah, never gonna happen. You can be bald and she'll still call you duck fluff."

Clint tried unsuccessfully to rescue his hair from Logan but kept getting it messed up again as soon as he got it lying flat. "You're totally on her side. It's not fair!"

"I'd be stupid to be on anyone else's side," Logah laughed. "Married her for a reason, kiddo."

"Yeah, well, don't forget I saw her first," Clint said, leveling his finger at Logan — because it was a tease he'd never, ever, let up on.

"Still not gonna let that go, eh?"

"Nope. Because it's always gonna be true," Clint replied without missing a beat.

"Save it for when she's around to hear it," Logan told him quietly.

Clint shrugged. "Okay," he said, then turned to Steve. "I'm gonna go hang out with my brother and sister — unless you still want to get mad at me for helping Dad and Bruce?"

"No, go do what you were going to do," Steve said in a breath, and as Clint left, he continued, "You were going to anyhow."

* * *

When Clint got to the mansion for the weekend, the _other _leader of a superheroic team came to talk to him about his life decisions. As expected.

Or, well, _almost _as expected.

Instead of coming at him and demanding that Clint explain how he could be so _stupid_, Scott stopped in front of him, frowning hard, before he asked, simply, "Walk me through what happened."

Clint grinned, glad that _someone _was willing to give him the benefit of the doubt on not being totally crazy. "It was kind of amazing, not gonna lie," he said, trying not to look like he was _too _happy about it or he'd get accused of rushing in for the thrill of it.

"I meant what happened _before _you decided to take a nearly suicidal ride on the Hulk," Scott said dryly.

"It wasn't suicidal," Clint argued. "It _wasn't_. I knew he wasn't going to hurt me!"

"But _how_?" Scott pressed. "I'm not saying you didn't know what you were doing. But I need to know how you got there. I don't want this to just be a _lucky guess_. If it was, you might not be so lucky next time."

Clint shook his head quickly. "It wasn't a guess," he said, but when Scott held his gaze, he sighed, knowing he'd have to explain it _again_. "Look, I pay attention, okay? I could see that Mr. Banner was upset because James was upset, and I watched the Hulk when he started transforming. He moved _away _from us and _toward _the fight. He wasn't going to let us kids get hurt. So I figured when he got distracted with his grudge match with my dad, if one of the people he wanted to keep _safe _came to remind him what was what, that would work better than people he was actively fighting trying to talk him down." He shrugged. "It makes sense."

Scott frowned for a long time and then, finally, gestured for Clint to sit with him. "You scared everyone there, Clint. No one knew what you were thinking."

"I didn't have time to explain…"

"And if you'd been wrong?" Scott asked, one eyebrow raised.

"I wasn't."

Scott pinched the bridge of his nose. That response was _so _much like his parents that Scott had to pause a moment before he even tried to respond. Finally, he said, "That's not the point. The point is that you ran in on a _theory_. Even if you were right this time, you might not be right the next time."

Clint shook his head. "It wasn't a theory," he said. "I knew the Hulk wouldn't hurt me, because I _saw _him avoiding us when he was growing into a giant. And he spent the whole fight shielding me." He crossed his arms and tipped his head up. "I might not know strategies like you do, but I know _people_. I know who I can trust."

Scott held Clint's gaze for a moment longer before he finally nodded. "This is why you're in training, Clint," he said. "Because you rush in. Your instincts are good, but you _need _backup. And your backup can't help you if you don't _tell _them what you're thinking."

"The Avengers don't have telepathic links, and I _told _you there wasn't time," Clint insisted. "But seeing as everyone's so bent outta shape, I'll _try _and send up smoke signals or something," he added, rolling his eyes.

"Clint, this is serious."

"Don't you think I know that?" Clint shot back. "They were shooting at my _dad_. It was the same department that shot me, too — before they even knew I could heal! I know what those guys can do, okay?"

"But you've never faced the Hulk," Scott started to say, but Clint cut him off with an irritated noise.

"So? You guys face bad guys for the first time all the time, and you have to act on first impressions and instincts and _cheating _from Jean, don't you?" Clint said. "I know what I saw, and I know what I knew, and I ran with it. That's what you're supposed to _do_."

Scott massaged his forehead. "This wasn't the first time the _Avengers _have dealt with the Hulk. You had others around you who know the guy — both versions of him. But you did your own assessment."

"And I was right," Clint said again.

Scott sighed. "Clint…"

"Still right."

"That's not—" Scott let out a breath of frustration. "I just need you to be more _careful_, Clint. I don't want you to be more reckless now that you're training with us — and especially now that you can heal."

"Um, Scott, I don't know if anyone told you, but it still _hurts_. I'm not _stupid_."

"I didn't say you were."

"Good." Clint got to his feet, then decided to give Scott a break. "For the record, you're taking this a lot better than Cap did. I thought he was gonna have a heart attack right in front of me."

"Maybe I should have one too," Scott said, only half-joking.

"Aww, don't do that. Jean and Rachel and the twins need you around!" With that, Clint flashed Scott a _huge _smile and then bounced off before Scott could figure out how to turn the conversation back to getting the kid to be more _careful_.

* * *

When Carol and K got back to the _new _Avengers' headquarters — since the tower was a mess — the two of them looked positively wind-whipped and almost breathless from whatever it was they'd been doing. It was pretty clear they'd gone _out _after the mission, too, because neither of them were in uniform at all — casual wear only. But if the flash drive K was twirling between her fingers was any indicator, they had more intel to look through regarding what exactly General Ross was up to.

"What made you think we needed a distraction _that big_?" K asked Tony when he spotted the two of them and let out a sigh of relief.

"Wasn't us — they came to us. Your timing was just …"

"Awesome," Carol said. "We had our run of the place without even really trying." She pointed at Tony. "Oh, I should tell you. We got all this done off camera. Didn't need the help."

K slipped over to where Logan was looking pretty wiped out on the couch and took a moment to wrap her arms around him from behind and steal a little kiss. "You get it out of your system?"

"For today, anyhow," Logan agreed. James was curled up, sleeping on his father without a care in the world.

"He got to fight the Hulk!" Katie informed K, running over to wrap her up in a hug at the knees.

"Oh good," K said, resting her hand on Katie's head. "He said he needed to stretch. Who did _you _beat up, then?"

"I wasn't 'llowed to because of how I was watching out for Billy and Tommy," Katie said, looking perfectly disappointed.

"That's good, though. They're still brand-spanking-shiny-and new, and they need someone clever and quick to keep them out of trouble," K told her before she let her voice drop to a stage whisper. "I mean … _Kurt and Wanda _are their parents … that's all kinds of trouble."

Katie giggled delightedly and nodded. "And Billy told me about how they met their grandpa with the cape and their grandma who's super evil! They got lots of stuff to worry about!"

"They sure do. So they're lucky to have you on their side, right?" K picked her up and hugged her tightly, then shifted her to her hip and handed her the flash drive. "Keep a good hold on that. Iron Man's gonna want it, and we have to make him work for it. Got it?"

Katie nodded dutifully. "What should I make 'im do to get it?" she asked, completely serious.

K looked over at Carol and sidestepped her way closer so that Katie was in between the two of them. "What do you think, Captain Marvel?"

"It's gotta be something good," Carol said. "He gets everything too easy otherwise."

Katie pushed her lower lip out and then lit up. "Oooh, I got it!" she said. "I got it! He's gotta get a _ring _for Miss Jan! Cuz of how she wants one!"

"We don't want to _kill him_," K said - loud enough for Tony to hear it. "He could have a heart attack if we tell him that."

"And he's _very _delicate," Carol agreed, nodding sagely. "But if you think Jan is the key, we could maybe let her help figure out what to do."

"If we're gonna _use _that intel, you girls might want to pick a finish line that ain't ten years down the line," Logan called out.

"He's got to set up more cross-team practices," Carol said. "There is no way we can let these kids all end up being X-Men."

"Um, 'scuse me, but my brother's bein' an X-Man-Avenger," Katie said, her hands on her hips. "And so am I, when I get big enough. We don't gotta _pick_."

"Well excuse me, Miss Purple-Bow Kate," Carol teased. "I just want you around more to take old Iron Man down a few notches."

"If you're nice — and lucky — then Miss Carol might even teach you to fly when you're older," K whispered to Katie. "Maybe just make sure Tony asks Jan _out _on a real date."

"Oh, and not just where they stay home and eat popcorn," Kate said, nodding her understanding.

"Yes," K said. "Tell him where they need to go to be romantic."

"Somewhere … somewhere pretty," Katie said thoughtfully. "With a beach. No mountains, cuz that's where my first mom died, and I don't want Miss Jan to get hurt, so no skiing or nothing, mkay?"

"Can I please have that flash drive, Miss Katie?" Tony asked in a tired tone with his hand out. "No skiing. Not even waterskiing."

"Only if you promise you'll take her somewhere _super romantic_," Katie said, holding the drive tight.

"He doesn't know where that might be," Carol stage whispered to Katie.

"You gotta take her to the beach to look at the stars on the water," Katie insisted. "And… and you have to have dinner with _candles_."

Tony spared a half-hearted glare at Carol and K but bucked up to cover his heart with one hand. "On my life, I'll take her to the beach with the candles and the whole nine. _Now _can I get that drive?"

Katie sized him up carefully. "I dunno…"

"He's gotta ask her first," K said into Katie's hair. "She might not wanna go if he doesn't ask."

Katie nodded. "Yeah, you gotta ask her. Cuz you kiiiiinda look like you might not."

Tony looked supremely flustered as he spun on his heel to face Jan — who, like Carol, looked like she was barely holding back the giggles. "Jan. Miss Van Dyne. Would you _please _consider stepping out of the loonie bin with me for a night?"

"Well, not if it's just for the flash drive," Jan said — just holding it together enough to reply before she started laughing.

By that time, Logan had heard enough, and he got to his feet quickly. He made his way over to where the girls were giving Tony a hard time, then handed James to Carol before he picked up Katie and hung her upside down to tickle her until she was squealing with laughter. When he pulled her back up, he put his hand out for the drive. "Come on, Katie. No games. We want to catch the creeps, right?"

"O-kaaay," Katie said, relinquishing the drive at last. "Just for _you_, Daddy."

Logan kissed her cheek then turned toward Tony to slap the drive in his hand. "You owe me, Stark." Then, he turned to Carol. "And you've been drinking without me. Come on, let's teach the kids how to play poker. The twins should know early for as diabolical as the family is."


	4. What Boys Want

**A/N: I've survived the first three months after having a baby, and little mini-robbie is finally getting a consistent bedtime. Not sleeping through the night, but he does at least understand that night time is for sleeping, waking up, eating, and then sleeping again. Which is enough progress for me to feel like a person and get back to this story! :D**

* * *

**Chapter 4: What Boys Want**

Clint was sure that Tony and Jan's date had gone pretty darn well, because the next time he saw them, at James' first birthday party, they were orbiting each other. Which Clint thought was good. He'd hated seeing Jan get hurt, and after seeing how good Logan was at being a dad, Clint was warming up to the idea of finding _good _people to be with women who'd met losers before.

Katie, of course, was way less subtle about noticing the way Tony and Jan were acting around each other. She was all giggles and "told you so"s — but that was what little sisters did. They were just like that.

And speaking of little sisters… Clint had to laugh when he saw Rachel trying to keep Lizzie from crawling after James while James was playing with the wrapping paper of his presents. The kids were too young to know how to share, and Rachel wasn't old enough to do anything but pick her sister up around the middle and make distressed noises until Jean or Scott came to untangle the girls — all while James smiled at both of them encouragingly and Nate used the opportunity to steal wrapping paper for himself while everyone was distracted.

Billy and Tommy were trouble, too, because they had taken one look at the smash cake Jean bought for James and declared that they wanted smash cakes too. And, well, technically, that summer would be their first birthday, so they had a good argument to make — helped along by Katie, who kept insisting that they _had _to have the _best _first birthday ever because they had already missed so many.

It was, basically, chaos — but it was a fun kind of chaos that Clint could appreciate. More and more kids were showing up at the school, and it was kind of novel to be among the oldest. He was even old enough now that some of the other students were the same age.

He sat down next to his mom and handed her a piece of cake from the not-smashed cake. His was much bigger than hers, and she'd probably end up sharing it with one of the kids anyway, but he always wanted her to remember that he had her back, so he liked to get her food sometimes.

"You are the _best _kid," K told him. "And an amazing big brother."

"Jean says that too," Clint said, gesturing toward where the three Summers kids were now having a small fight. "We've got a _lot _of kids around now to watch out for, too."

"Yeah, you gotta watch that one," K said. "She's pretty baby crazy."

Clint turned her way with wide eyes and pretended to be shocked. "She _is_?"

"I know, right? _Shocker._"

Clint snickered and leaned back in his seat with his piece of cake. "Dad's been helping me train; did he tell you about how he's been teaching me exactly what _not _to say to Scott in a briefing? Because it's hilarious."

"As if my sweetheart would coach you on what _not _to do," she replied, smiling crookedly. "I'm sure that's the most detail you've heard in weeks, too."

"Oh yeah. I tried to ask some other stuff, and then I asked as a _joke _to teach me in reverse, and wouldn't you know it?" Clint grinned crookedly. "I think my favorite so far is 'okay but what's Plan 2 because this one's no good'."

"Yeah, I might have overheard him do exactly that … only he was down to Plan 7 and Scott was turning purple."

Clint grinned even wider, then glanced over at Jean, who was laughing. "We have an eavesdropper at six o'clock."

"She's always trying to learn how to be more like the cool kids," K replied easily.

Jean snorted from across the room, and Clint laughed, then turned toward K's plate. "Are you gonna finish your cake?"

"Knock yourself out, sweet-tooth."

"He knew you weren't gonna finish it in the first place," Katie pointed out as she came over and climbed into K's lap, parking herself on an adult as a way to get out of playing with the other kids when Tommy was being _weird_, in her opinion.

"We have an agreement about that," K told her as she wrapped one arm around her and kissed the side of her head. "You can steal most of my cake on your birthday, if you want."

"Yes, please," Katie said brightly, then made a face at Tommy when he came over. "I don't wanna play right now, Tomahawk. I'm _snuggling_."

"Whatcha up to, Tomcat?" K asked. "Cruising around and following all the pretty girls?"

"Uh-huh!" Tommy grinned at K enthusiastically. "Dad says you gotta tell pretty girls they're pretty. It's a _rule_."

"It's a good rule to remember," she agreed.

Katie rolled her eyes. "Mom, I don't wanna be _pretty _right now. I wanna be a '_Venger_. He's bein' _weird_."

"Do you think I can't do both at once?"

"No," Katie admitted. "But that's not what we're playing!"

"I can threaten him," Clint said, sounding like it was the best possible option — and a present to _him _on his brother's birthday.

Katie giggled. "He's too _new_ to threaten! That's like threatening a _baby_!"

"I'm not a _baby_," Tommy insisted, his arms crossed and his eyes narrowed. "I'm as big as you are!"

"Yeah, but you're not as _old_," K said, joining in the teasing just to get Katie giggling more.

Tommy looked betrayed. "But I'm _not _a baby. I'm not. I can walk and talk and — and Lizzie and Nate can't do those things and they're only a few months older!"

"It's just different rules," K told him. "Does Billy hate only being a year-ish old too?"

"Nope!" Billy sang out from where he was helping himself to more cake. "Summer birthday bash in a few months! Mom says we're getting a _kiddie pool_."

"And by 'kiddie pool' she means 'Stark's idea of a kiddie pool', so do with that what you will," Kurt chuckled, gently nudging Billy away from the cake so he didn't have any more sugar.

"Billy-boy," K called out to catch his attention. "Katie was just calling dibs on my cake for her next birthday ... you want to pick someone's birthday to steal my cake?"

Billy completely missed the dry look his dad was giving K over the top of his head. "Oooh, yes! Can I pick _yours_?"

"I don't know," K said, turning to Clint. "Can he pick mine?"

Clint sighed as if this was the greatest possible imposition. "I _guess_."

"Then you can have a latte with me that morning," K told him. "As your consolation prize."

Clint's whole expression shifted, and he bounced slightly on his toes. "Really?"

"Don't see why not," she replied. "You've been drinking a little of the regular brew for a while. You _did _like my latte last time I shared, didn't you?"

"Um, who _doesn't _like chocolate and caramel?" Clint said, scrunching up his nose.

"Oooh, I want some!" Katie said. "That sounds yummy!"

"You can taste one next time I get one," K promised.

"Oh! Oh! Me too!" Tommy said, bouncing up and down with his hand in the air as if he was trying to get called on. "Me too!"

"I'll buy an extra one when I get one for myself — and I'll pour it out in little tiny glasses for each of you if you want."

"You mean we get a latte _and _we get special us-sized glasses?" Billy looked like he was about to fall over with happiness. "For _real_?"

"Of course," K said with a grin, already plotting out how she was going to do it with shot glasses — purely for the looks the adults would all be wearing when they saw it. "It'll be fun."

"You're spoiling them," Kurt said, shaking his head — but if he was trying to be a stern parent, he was betrayed by his tail moving behind him in the lazy pattern it always did when he was entertained.

"You'll enjoy it too," she said, smiling up at him. She waved Billy over and pulled him into the snuggle — since Katie seemed to be okay with _Billy_ at the moment. "Should we do it tomorrow?" K asked him at a stage whisper. "I can get up early and bring some home ... or … we could ask _Logan _to get it for us. I bet he will."

"Oooh, definitely," Billy said, his eyes wide as he nodded along with her. "Dad says if someone you love asks you for something, you should try to do it if you can because it shows you love them. So that means Logan's _gotta_."

"It doesn't mean you guilt trip them into it, though," K told him, shaking her head at his logic. "But it never hurts to ask."

Billy scrunched up his nose. "Um, why would you feel _guilty _about doing something nice for someone you love? That doesn't even make _sense_."

"If he has other things he needs to do, then it's alright to say no without feeling guilty about _not _doing something for me," K said. "Does that make sense?"

"I guess so," Billy said slowly, one eye closed. "Dad never says no to Mom, though."

"Logan doesn't say no either," K said. "And most of the time, he does things before I can even ask."

"He's so _romantic,_" Katie sang out, complete with a dramatic little eyelash flutter.

Tommy gestured wordlessly at Katie as he met K's gaze, obviously making the case that he'd been _trying _to be romantic from the start.

K shook her head at him. "Everyone's a little different," she said as she held Tommy's gaze.

"Well, how do you know _how _different?" Tommy asked grumpily.

"You just have to get to know them," K said.

"Yeah, it's _hard_," Tommy sighed — and Billy slipped down out of K's lap to hug his brother, since he looked so crestfallen. He could sympathize; it was a lot harder to be a person when they hadn't had enough time to get used to life. It was even harder to navigate complicated emotions right off the bat.

"No," K said. "It just takes some time."

"I'm not very patient," Tommy grumbled.

Billy grinned and leaned toward K. "Mom taught us that word. She uses it a _lot_."

"Yeah, well, she's not very patient either," K told him at a mock whisper. "And your Dad … he's _awful _about patience. Most of the time."

Billy leaned forward to match her. "She says that too," he said, also speaking at a mock whisper.

"I'll bet she does. She could probably use some snuggles and spoiling too," she told him. "Maybe … you could bring her some ice cream and share with her. I bet she'd _love it_."

"Ooh, yes, she would!" Billy said, already rushing off to do just that, with Tommy right behind him insisting that he wanted to help too.

"Okay, Katie," K said, letting her volume drop so they wouldn't be overheard. "What did Tommy do?"

"We were playing 'Vengers, and it was my turn to be the bad guy, but he said I was too _pretty_ to be the bad guy." She pulled a face. "It's not fair! It was my turn, and everyone else got to be heroes, so how come I can't let them take a turn too? I can do it! I'm not _really _a bad guy!"

"Well," K said, weighing it out. "It's not your fault that he doesn't see it like that. He just knows you're too pretty inside _and _out to be evil. He's not as old as he looks, remember. He has to learn. And learning that pretty girls can be evil too might be a really good lesson for him. But … I still don't want you to be mean to him just to teach him a lesson. Just take your turn next time — and if he argues it, _capture him first. _He can be your damsel in distress. See how he handles that."

Katie thought it over and then grinned crookedly. "He'd be a cute damsel," she decided.

"He'd probably get all ruffled about it, too." She kissed her head again. "If he thinks pretty girls can't be the bad guy, he _probably _thinks he can't be caught. And _that _would be a really good lesson for him to learn, right? So he doesn't get in trouble with Hydra guys or anyone like that."

Katie's eyes were wide as she nodded. "I don't want him to get in any trouble!" she said sincerely. "He's my friend, and I like him when he's not being _weird_."

"Oh, sweetheart. You better get used to weird," K told her. "You're going to have lots of boys being weird around you. They can't help it. They get around pretty, and their brains shut off."

"Yeah, like, think of Barney," Clint said with a crooked smile. "And _Ana_."

"Don't throw stones, handsome," K warned. "It _will _come back to bite you."

"No prospects, Mom. I'm too busy being _awesome_!" Clint called back.

"Yeah, I did that for a long time too … then 'long comes trouble …"

Katie giggled. "Yep. Dad says boys are trouble. That's true."

"He's the best kind of trouble, though," K told her.

"Um, no, _I'm _the best trouble," Katie said. "I'm a whole handful! You say so all the time!"

"You sure are," K agreed as she started tickling her. "A whole handful of _sass_."

Clint grinned as Katie squirmed and giggled until the tickling was over. He knew Katie was a handful because she was five, and that was a whole handful, but Katie sometimes missed that part of the joke. Then, once the two of them were settled out, he offered to take K's plate and his to the trash. "You're hilarious, Mom."

"It's a high bar, keeping up with you," she shot back.

"Yes. Yes, it is," Clint said, grinning before he headed back to the kitchen — not at all surprised to see that James had fallen asleep on Logan after all the excitement. "Mom's trying to teach Katie about boys already," he informed Logan as he threw away his plates.

"_Why_?" Logan asked, frowning at him.

"Tommy." Clint shrugged, knowing if he left his explanation short, the results would be funnier.

"Ah. Yeah, that'd do it," Logan said. "She'll be fine. Should be fun to see what she teaches her about boys. Probably somethin' to do with knockin' the wind out of their sails if they're bein' a pain."

"She says Katie should capture Tommy and make him be a damsel in distress next time they play Avengers," Clint said, still totally entertained by the mental image.

Logan chuckled at that, low and rumbling. "Yep. That'll do it alright."

"Mom made it sound like she needed to do it to keep him safe from getting scooped up by Hydra like she was that one time. Katie got all protective after that."

Logan was smiling to himself and nodding. "And she says I'm the troublemaker. She got anything else lined up with her following of half-grown trouble?"

"She's buying a latte and sharing it with all of us tomorrow just because Kurt tried to cut off the sugar," Clint whispered with one hand to his mouth.

"Makes perfect sense," Logan said, smiling outright. "Kurt and Wanda wanted to watch the kids tomorrow."

Almost on cue, Wanda made her way over to where Logan and Clint were chatting quietly. She looked as if she'd been having a great time, though it was clear she was looking for _something_. And that something was James — that much was obvious when she shifted around Logan to look at James as he slept peacefully on his dad's shoulder.

"If you wanted to take a minute with K—" Wanda started to say.

"I do, but that won't happen with the crowd," Logan said.

"I can hold him if you like," she offered, her hands already half lifted to pick him up.

But Logan shook his head and turned away from her. "Get your own."

She broke into a smile, already well-aware he was giving her a hard time about _cheating_ and skipping all the tough stuff when it came to kids. "Oh come on."

"Hey. If you wanted a baby, you'd have wished for one. You wanted big kids. Took me friggin' forever to get a baby. You can get your own." His tone was pure teasing — but it was a line that Kurt had heard already a few times that day. "Even Jeannie bit the bullet. You're slackin' for not even tryin'."

"And you can't wish for a baby," Clint clarified, knowing exactly where his dad was going with the teasing and more than willing to help. "You gotta _have _a baby. No cheating!"

"You've got your kids _helping you_," Wanda laughed.

"I didn't recruit him," Logan said. "He's just got the sense to see it himself. Besides, princess, you're takin' all the fun out of it."

"The boys are _fun_," Wanda defended.

"Not what I meant and you know it," Logan replied. "Maybe they need a sister. Or a little brother. What do you think, Clint?"

"Yes."

"See?" Logan said. "Whatcha waitin' for?"

Wanda shook her head, though she was smiling. "You're in a good mood," she said instead of answering him. "We should let you fight the Hulk and then eat cake with your son every other weekend."

"Sure," he said. "I could use a stretch."

"And the Hulk is _fun_," Clint said. "I'm in!"

"Right _after _you figure out how afraid of natural-born twins you are in your family," Logan said as he and Clint started back toward K and Katie.

"You're terrible, you know that?" Wanda called after him.

"I've heard it already," Logan called back.

Clint snickered as he fell into step with Logan. This was, in his opinion, the best possible way to celebrate his little brother's first birthday.


	5. You're a Bad Guy

**Chapter 5: You're a Bad Guy**

"I don't see what your issue is with this," K was saying to Tony. After the last attack — and after all the intel that she and Carol had gone through — she'd taken all of two minutes to convince Tony to work with her on making her a few customized items. He just didn't seem to realize that he'd agreed to customizing a few things for Clint, too. And K was happily setting him straight while teasing him relentlessly.

"My issue is that he hasn't hit puberty yet," Tony said, though he was smiling all the same — in part because K had shown up ready to distract and convince him. She and Clint both were going low key to keep from drawing any attention, but for her, that meant tight jeans and a tank top — and for Clint, it was a Hulk t-shirt that Bruce positively hated. But they _looked _like part of the crowd.

"I'm his mom. If I tell you he's responsible enough for _small _explosives, that's like hearing it from a higher power, right sweetheart?" K said, glancing over at Clint.

"Oh, definitely," Clint said, nodding along. "Gotta listen to Mom. It's a law. Look it up."

"See? Kid knows what he's talking about, _Mr. Stark_," K said, laying it on a little thicker just because she knew it would get to him. "Come on. I'll give you nefarious ideas that we can build off of for things that go boom."

"Small enough for arrows, please!" Clint sang out.

"I … I can't do that," Tony said, smiling and shaking his head at their persistence.

"So…" K tipped her head. "Tony, I _really _need some explosive arrowheads. For _me_. _Totally _for me."

"She _does _shoot," Clint supplied helpfully. "She taught me and Barney, you know."

"I did not," Tony said, looking between them. "Do I get a demo before I consider it?"

K turned to Clint with a sparkle of trouble dancing in her eyes. "What do you think, sweetheart?"

Clint tipped his head to the side and smirked. "If he thinks it'll help him ease his conscience about helping _you_…"

"I'm not sure it's his conscience that's talking," K whispered to Clint. "But the outcome is the same."

"Mom, Tony doesn't think I'm _old enough _for talk like that," Clint said with faked wide-eyed innocence.

"Which is probably why he talks that way anyhow," she said.

"Well, if I'm old enough to listen to him try to get in your pants, I'm old enough for explosives," Clint said decisively.

"That's like … eighty percent of my argument," K agreed.

"So he'll agree," Clint said, smirking hard when Tony looked exasperated and amused at the same time, since the two of them building off of each other was a sight to see too.

"You're not playing fair, either one of you," Tony said, though he put his arm around K's shoulders to steer them toward the lab. "But … let's see what we can come up with." K winked at Clint but let Tony steer, joking around as they headed off.

But when they were almost to the elevator, the doors opened to reveal an Army general in full uniform, who looked grumpy at first — and then positively shocked — before he shifted into what looked like angry and calculating.

"Well this explains _everything_," General Ross said.

Tony stopped, though he didn't shift his position as he drew in a deep breath and held it. "General Ross. What brings you here … unannounced, uninvited, and frankly … a little unwelcome after the last time we crossed paths? You know … with your troops playing toy soldier on American soil?"

"As much as you hate to be reminded of it, Stark, you have a contract to uphold with our government. You know, the guys who pay you the big bucks while _authorizing _my men to conduct operations necessary for the safety and security of our nation."

"Well, hello to the handbook you swallowed too," Clint said before he'd even thought about it.

"We can catch up to you later," K started to say as she put a hand on Clint and turned to leave, but Tony quickly took a better grip with a quiet 'nope' that made it clear they were better off staying where he could keep them away from the entourage that Ross undoubtedly had with him.

"If you want to make an appointment," Tony said, making a face at the general, "we can work out whatever it is you want me to change from the latest contract. But I can't discuss details without the legal department … so …."

Ross chuffed and tucked his hat under his arm. "Got more pressing appointments with _terrorists_? How does that outrank your own government?"

"Nope, just not operating outside of office hours," Tony said, determined to keep it light and avoid escalation.

"It's two o'clock in the afternoon."

"And office hours ended at one."

"You can't just ignore me, Stark," Ross said. "We're the good guys in this fight. You're going to want to come out on the right side of it."

Clint burst out with a laugh that seemed to surprise the men in the room. "The _good guys_? Seriously? Get your eyes checked, General."

"Kid, you've got a skewed interpretation of things." Ross turned his attention to K. "Not that I'm surprised."

"Huh. Well, see, the thing is, you're with Department H, right?" When Ross blinked, Clint took that as confirmation. "Working with them, working for them, whatever. You've teamed up with the bad guys."

"I'm not sure where you get ideas like that, young man, but even if that were true — and I'm not saying it is — that's so far above anything you have any _right _to have an opinion about, it's not even funny."

Clint shook his head, squaring up in all his lanky preteen glory. "When I was seven," he said in a slow but dangerous tone, "the department threatened to hurt me because they wanted my mom. They didn't care who I was, just that I was leverage. When I was eight, they let a creep tie me down and experiment on me. They didn't know or care if I was even human. They just let him do it because I was with my mom. When I was ten, they kidnapped me — twice. The second time, they shot me in the leg. I'm eleven now and spending all my time looking over my shoulder and worrying about my _baby _brother, who just turned one. So yeah, they're the bad guys. Which makes you one too. Obviously."

Ross's gaze softened slightly — but only for a moment. "I don't know of any outfit that would do that to a kid, but it's a nice story."

"Honey, come on," K said, her hands on Clint's shoulders. "Some people aren't worth trying to talk to."

Clint kept his chin up — he was getting taller and was almost tall enough that he didn't have to look too far up at the general. "He just called me a liar, Mom."

"And there's nothing we can do about that, sweetheart," K said softly. "So we should just go before things get out of hand."

"No," Tony said, putting himself in between K and the General, though he was facing K and Clint. "You two can stay. I don't want you going anywhere. General Ross knows he's supposed to make an _appointment_." From there, he pushed Ross back toward the elevator, not taking no for an answer. He gave K a quick glance, hoping she and Clint would get back a little bit — just in case.

Clint tipped his head back to look at K, and when he _realized _how still she was, he signed, _How many guys do you think he brought? _

_Not risking it with you. Neither is Tony. _

_That bad? _

_Yes_.

Clint bit his lip and nodded slowly. _Alright. But he's still an idiot._

_Smarter than he looks, _K replied carefully.

_He'd have to be. _

"I need to call Logan," K said quietly, once they were around the corner and a little distanced from the ongoing argument at the elevator. "I don't know how the hell we're going to get out of here safely otherwise."

Clint stopped and blinked, his stomach dropping. "I didn't even think about that," he admitted — which was frustrating in and of itself because he was _supposed _to be working on strategy and thinking ahead because both leaders of the teams he wanted to join thought he didn't think ahead enough. And here he was doing just that.

"I don't know if Tony's gotten that far yet either," K told him.

"That's because he's pushing the idiot into an elevator. One thing at a time, Mom," Clint said with a small smile, trying to get her to relax.

"Yeah, I know," she agreed. "Still." She waited, out of sight, but listening in all the same, and when Tony came toward them, he was moving at a good clip.

"We need to get you out — and we need to do it so they can't track you. Sooner the better."

Clint looked between the two adults in the room. He'd never seen them look this stressed. "So, can someone explain to me who this guy is — after we get home, I mean? You two are way too freaked to talk to me."

"He's a general, Clint," Tony said. "One with a lot of pull and a lot of friends in high places. The fact that he knows who your mom is on sight should tip you off on how dirty he can be."

"He's also the guy that's after the Hulk," K told Clint quietly.

"Huh." Clint held his breath. "I had a feeling. Threw the department at him to see, but…" He looked over his shoulder toward the elevator Ross had gone through. "Tony, how come you have the guy who wants the Hulk captured making appointments with you?"

"I don't get a say in who acts as liaison for the government," Tony said. "Used up all my picks when I pushed to get Rhodey to rep the Air Force."

"He's a freakin' supervillain, Tony!" Clint threw both hands in the air. "You know that or you wouldn't be trying to get me and Mom out of here!"

"And I still have to deal with him," Tony pointed out as he handed K his phone. "I'm going to go out on a limb and guess you have your own ideas on how to leave?"

"Maybe one or two," she agreed as she called Logan and stepped into the next room over to make the call, leaving Clint with Tony for a moment.

Clint glanced up at Tony and took in the nervous way he shifted his weight before he spoke up. "Thanks," he said quietly.

"No problem," Tony said with a little nod. "I'll ... ah … I'll take a look at your mom's specs and see what I can do."

Clint perked up instantly. "You mean it?"

"Sure. I was going to do it anyhow, just … havin' a little fun," Tony said with a shrug.

"Thanks!" Clint probably would have done more celebrating, but under the circumstances, all he could manage was a bright grin and a bounce. "I promise I'll use 'em right. Like screwing with the department next time they bother me."

"Yeah, I know you will," Tony said with a little smirk before K came back around the corner with a sigh. "Keep away from the windows — just in case. How long before Nightcrawler comes in?"

"Any time," K replied, then handed him back the phone. "So. Raincheck?"

"On the ideas or the flirting? Because only one of those is really acceptable."

"Yes," she said. "Both. Sorry, the atmosphere went south too fast."

"Ugh, can you _not _rain check the flirting?" Clint asked, rolling his eyes.

"You do know that the only way I'd ever actually risk it was if she wasn't married, right?" Tony said, raising one eyebrow his way. "I don't have a death wish."

"Oh, so you're _not _as stupid as you come off," Clint said, looking perfectly shocked.

"Didn't say that."

"That's what I thought." Clint grinned crookedly up at Tony and then waved when Kurt arrived in a poof of blue and black. "Hi, we're trouble magnets," he called out to Kurt.

"No one is surprised," Kurt laughed, though he looked around the room all the same. "How bad is it?"

"General Ross and Department H both pulling the government funding card thinking that gets them in my door," Tony said, his eyes narrowed. "For the record, I've refused to supply the department. Didn't know Ross was tied in this deep."

"Makes sense though," K pointed out. "Department sent my sweetheart after the Hulk with some success. Ross wants the Hulk at all costs …"

"Tony pushed him into an elevator," Clint put in helpfully.

"But not down the shaft like he was asking," Tony said. "He's got soldiers following him all the time. They woundn't have been able to go _home _if you didn't show up."

Kurt frowned but put his hands on Clint and K's shoulders. "Then it's a good thing we can simply circumvent the tedium of doors," he said.

"One big 'screw you' bamf," Clint agreed, still looking toward his mom and trying to get a solid smile out of her, since he didn't like anything that made her nervous and dealt with his _own _nerves over the whole thing by joking around.

K gave him a quiet smile but didn't say anything until after Kurt teleported them back to Westchester. And then, what she said was, "Where's Logan?"

"With Scott," Kurt told her — and didn't get to say anything else before K made a beeline down the hall.

Clint sighed and glanced up at Kurt. "So," he said slowly, "how freaked should I be?"

Kurt sighed heavily. "The fact that your mother looked that serious even after the initial contact would tell me that you should be _very _freaked. But … considering that you are no longer in that precise situation but are now sheltered by the combined might of our entire team — _and the Phoenix_ — I feel as if you are much safer _now_."

"Good point," Clint said. "Jean would totally roast that guy and the army he rode in with."

"Exactly."

Clint was quiet for a long moment before he said, "Yeah, but the thing is, that guy is going to keep bugging the Avengers. He's gonna keep coming after the Hulk. We can't just take care of _us_."

"Clint," Kurt said softly, "do you think that the Avengers won't take care of their own as well? Tony and Bruce are good friends. I am very sure he'll do all he can to protect Bruce."

"Then you didn't see how stressed Tony looked," Clint replied. "Because it was pretty obvious he's _worried_. And we can help. I know we can."

"Then we'll have to see if the two groups can work together," Kurt said. "And considering that Wanda is an Avenger, I think we can manage something."

"Yeah, that probably helps," Clint said, glancing up at Kurt again. "_Probably _a good thing you guys weren't there, because that guy thinks the X-Men are terrorists and Billy and Tommy aren't old enough to get the whole… leaving bad guys alone thing." He grinned crookedly. "Me either, but I got enough practice to back it up."

"You had good backup today," Kurt said. "We'll be more careful with you kids and anyone close to the military."

"Yeah, well, that general thought _he _was a good guy, and it still makes me mad. He called me a liar and everything." Clint rolled his eyes. "I can't wait until I'm an Avenger and an X-Man so I can give it back to idiots like that."

Kurt watched Clint and shook his head quietly. This kind of thing was exactly why the adult X-Men had been united on slow-walking him in his quest to join the team. He was _too _eager.

Not that Kurt could judge. Not that _any _of them could judge, considering their own paths. But as the X-Men became parents and the mansion filled with small children, caution was the byword.

Hopefully, Clint would figure that out sooner rather than later.

But in the meantime, it was obvious Clint was still brimming with nervous energy from his encounter with Ross, so Kurt put his hand on his shoulder with a troublemaking smirk. "In the meantime," he said, "why don't you and I practice your swordplay while your parents discuss their plans?"

Clint looked up at Kurt with one eye closed. "Are you just trying to keep me out of their planning?"

"On the contrary," Kurt said. "We don't want you getting rusty when there are obviously so many wrongs you need to right when you get older."

Clint narrowed his eyes at Kurt but finally decided it wasn't worth an argument and nodded. "You're on. Winner picks the colors in darts."

* * *

Since Barney was around for the winter, he had gotten to see more of what Clint was doing to prepare for both teams and had even signed up for the same self-defense class. He was older, so he got combat classes, too. And he still didn't think Clint was as ready as he thought he was.

That was the thing about kid brothers. They were always getting into trouble.

But with Clint, it was a whole other level of trouble. Barney still wasn't over the fact that an evil scientist had turned him into a healer, much less the most recent incident when Clint had been shot and dragged off _right in front of Barney_.

So when Clint came in after sword training with Kurt wearing a familiar determined look, Barney knew trouble was brewing.

It looked like Clint and Kurt were headed for the darts, but Barney beat them to it, sliding over seamlessly to snatch up the blue darts for himself. "Who won?" he asked, because those two always turned training into a competition.

"Kurt — _but just barely_," Clint said, looking supremely irritated.

But Barney was glad to hear it. He worried about Clint more than he was sure his brother knew, and it was nice to hear that the adults in the X-Men were treating Clint more like a prospective teammate and less like a kid. Letting him win meant he would think he was ready to take on stuff he wasn't ready for.

Not that Clint wouldn't do it anyway, but Barney could dream.

"Reclaim your throne?" Barney said, offering Clint the red darts.

"Kurt and I were gonna—"

"No, no," Kurt said, smiling between the Barton brothers. "You and I can play at any time. It seems you've been neglecting your brother."

"He means you're scared you'll lose to me," Barney told Clint.

"Oh, you are so on."

Kurt smirked and teleported away, leaving the boys to their game, knowing that Clint couldn't resist a challenge and _also _knowing that Barney had been more concerned about Clint since his last run-in with the department than either boy was willing to admit. A run-in with Ross had to have Barney concerned, and he was showing that concern in his own way.

Still, there was a competition to be had, and the boys played several rounds of darts before Barney casually asked, "So, who was the idiot who ticked you off today?"

Clint raised both eyebrows and turned Barney's way, then let out a huff and tossed a dart a little harder than usual. "Some loser general who called me a liar and is working with the department."

Barney frowned, turning the dart in his hand a few times. "You have _way _too much experience with those guys, you know that? You're, like, four."

"Eleven."

"Same difference."

Clint rolled his eyes. "It doesn't matter anyway," he said. "Mom says this guy is strictly hands-off. You should have seen her when he showed up. She doesn't usually _freeze _like that." Although Clint had started out complaining, by the time he finished telling Barney about what he'd seen, Barney could hear the honest worry ringing in his tone, too.

With good reason. "Mom froze?" Barney breathed out.

Clint nodded. "She kept hanging onto me, holding me back. Didn't want me to take on the general. And _Tony _pushed him into an elevator."

"Wait, what?"

"Yeah, surprised me too."

"Was the elevator car still there?"

"Yeah, why?"

"Then he didn't do it right."

Clint blinked at Barney and then burst into a laugh that lasted longer than he meant it to — Barney turned out to be just the right antidote to the worry and anger that had been following him around like a dark cloud ever since Ross showed up. "Come on," he said once he had his composure again. "Let's go convince Mom to give us another lesson toward horseback archery."


	6. Barney's First Heartbreak

**Chapter 6: Barney's First Heartbreak**

Things had tightened down considerably since General Ross's mini invasion with Tony. The labs that the Avengers were using were in a different facility entirely, since the tower was still undergoing some repairs, and because of it, everything was in a bit of disarray. New personnel, new feel to the workspace, new view. All of it was enough to pull people off-balance.

And though Bruce was trying _very hard _to pay attention and go under the radar, he still was having trouble recognizing all the new people he was forced to be around due to the change in locale. Because of that, he was keeping to himself and his assistant and, of course, Tony when he insisted on popping in and being a pain.

Bruce was just going over the latest data on the long-running experiment he'd been forced to re-start when his lab assistant set a cup of coffee down at his elbow like he usually did. Bruce barely looked up as he thanked him, then absently picked up the cup and started to try to wake up.

He was halfway through the cup when he realized he wasn't waking up _at all_. And in fact, he seemed to be slipping. But even on realizing it, his heart rate didn't jump like it usually would, and his adrenaline didn't spike in the least. It was, in fact, the most relaxed Bruce had felt in ages, even knowing that he'd been drugged.

* * *

Barney hung up the phone in Westchester looking like someone had hit him with a truck and then looked up at K, who had been the one to pick up Miranda and Paul's call. He wasn't sure how much she'd heard when she was being polite and giving him distance to have a private conversation, but she looked perfectly sympathetic.

He let his shoulders drop. "Ana's grandparents aren't doing well," he said quietly, trying not to get upset because the whole thing was such a _reasonable _reason to go. "So… so her parents are moving the family to Pennsylvania and leaving the circus so they can take care of them." He took a stuttering breath. "So… so she won't be there this summer."

K let out a deep, weary sigh. "I'm so sorry, Barney. What can I do?"

"I dunno," Barney said, doing a horrible job of acting like he wasn't heartbroken. "They're leaving next month."

"So … you need to see them before then."

Both of Barney's eyebrows shot up, and a small smile tugged at the corner of his mouth. "Seriously?"

"Yeah, of course."

"When can we go?" Barney's mind was racing as he tried to figure out what he was even going to _say_ when he and Ana had been kissing for long enough to get teased about longer-term prospects now that they were both in high school. He hadn't even _thought _about what a _goodbye _would be like.

"When would be best?"

"I guess before they're packing up…" Barney bit his lip. "Soon? Yeah. Soon. That would be good. Just as soon as I figure out… anything. At all. With her."

"I'll talk to Logan; we'll make it a quick trip. He can stick around with James and the little ones; we'll hit the road like we used to. It should be easier for you to think that way."

"Can we bring Clint?" Barney asked. "Then it would _really _be like we used to do."

"I think he'd like that," K agreed. "I'll let you talk to him about it. You don't get to surprise him as much as I know you want to."

Barney broke into a grin. "Thanks, Mom," he said, trying not to rush off like he wanted to because he didn't want to look like an idiot kid.

* * *

As it turned out, Clint was with Kitty, teasing her relentlessly about her crush on someone so much _older _— which had Barney pausing in the doorway, since he'd had a crush on Kitty and knew the age gap there made Clint laugh, too. Telling him that Ana was moving in front of Kitty could open up a whole new avenue for teasing that he did _not _want to deal with from his obnoxious little brother.

Clint spotted him anyway, though, and waved him over. "What, are you a lurker now?" he teased.

Barney rolled his eyes and kicked off of the doorway. "Just wasn't sure if you were done telling Kitty what to do with her love life. Real smooth, Clint. I hear girls like being dictated to like that."

"First of all?" Clint turned toward Barney with his whole body. "At least I know when someone's old enough I don't have a chance and don't want to have a chance. And second, I'm not taking advice on girls from the guy who thinks the height of romance is hiding for kisses where you have to step around animal droppings."

"You're too busy picking fights with every bad guy in the world to notice if _anyone _has eyes for you. What do you know about romance?"

"Still more'n you." Clint crossed his arms. "Lurker."

Barney let out a frustrated noise. "Clint…" He shook his head, pinched his nose, and tried again. "I came to ask you if you wanted to go on a road trip just you, me, and Mom, but obviously, you're too busy being better than the rest of us, so I'll just tell Mom you can't make it."

"What?" Clint looked like Barney had completely thrown him off. "Wait!"

"No, you didn't sound like you were interested," Barney called back. "Might be better if you just stay here with the _little kids_."

"I'm the one who _found _Mom," Clint argued. "We were doing campouts and road trips before you even _called _her 'Mom'!"

"She must have realized I'm the superior brother. Too bad for you."

"Shut up, Barn; you aren't even here half the time."

"Absence makes the heart grow fonder or something."

"She feels bad for you not getting attention. It's pity, not favoritism."

"All the more reason to leave you here, then," Barney teased. "So she doesn't _feel _like she's favoring anyone."

"Shut up, Barn. When are we leaving?"

Barney grinned. "Well, Mom has to make sure Dad isn't gonna be swamped with the girls and James…"

"Then I guess we should start packing," Clint said. "Where are we going?"

"Does it really _matter_?"

"Nope," Clint agreed, then waved to Kitty and headed off with Barney to start packing — leaving Kitty shaking her head, bemused as always by the two Barton boys.

* * *

K had made the arrangements with Logan, and Logan had agreed quickly enough when he heard what the trouble was. Of course, he had also insisted on panic buttons and _team comms_ just in case. But considering how off in the edges Barney felt most of the time, a little trip with his brother and mom sounded like the kind of thing that would remind him of who loved him. And the boys _needed _it. Always.

Besides, the preparation for the trip alone was already serving as a reminder for Barney of where he stood with the family. Not only were Katie and Susie helping with the packing but the Summers twins were "helping" by taking clothes out of the bags, while Rachel actually tried to help and kept putting the clothes back in after the twins would take them out.

Barney might have missed the outpouring of love, though, because he was so focused on trying to figure out what to say to Ana. He definitely wanted to say goodbye to her, but on the other hand, he didn't want to come off as too sappy… so he was circling in his mind, going back and forth between ideas, and generally being quieter than usual.

Of course, K made sure to stop at some of Barney's favorite places to eat while they were on a road trip, so the mood didn't last, and he ended up enjoying himself despite the impending heartbreak all the same.

And it _was _nice to hang out just the three of them. It felt a lot like it had been when Clint and K had first found each other — eating out at restaurants, taking travel-tired naps in the back of the truck, and trying to out-do each other playing games like trying to find the farthest-away license plate on passing cars.

Eventually, though, they reached the rest of the circus, and Barney had to swallow down a nervous lump in his throat. Ana had been the first girl he'd actually been able to _date_. And now, he had to figure out how to say goodbye. He _still _hadn't worked that part out, actually.

Clint, of course, completely misinterpreted Barney's nerves. "Hoping you don't find your girl with a winter boyfriend?" he teased.

"Oh, shut up, Clint," Barney said, flushing without meaning to.

"I'll be here when you need a shoulder to cry on," Clint teased, not entirely realizing that he'd actually have to follow through on that promise soon enough.

Barney sighed, let his shoulders drop, and decided to ignore Clint for the time being as he made his way through the small crowd of his second family. Everyone that knew him threw up enthusiastic hellos and "when did you get here?"s, but…

There she was.

Ana looked completely caught off-guard when she saw Barney, but he was relieved to see her smiling when he came to join her where she was sitting outside trying to find some peace and quiet to read a book.

"Hey, so… so I heard you're leaving," Barney said, fully realizing how awkward he sounded and wishing he knew what to _say_.

Ana's expression softened, and she leaned toward him. "So you came here when you heard?" she asked. When he nodded, she smiled even more and then leaned forward to kiss him.

And, well, who was he not to run with a response like that?

* * *

By the time Barney caught back up with Clint and K, he was looking both more relaxed and more upset, somehow at the same time. He obviously still wasn't happy about Ana leaving, but on the other hand, it was plainly apparent the goodbye had fixed his mood right up.

And if Clint had been a little older, he might have thought twice about the teasing. Even if Barney was doing better, his shoulders were dropped, and he was staring at the ground despite the smile locked at the corner of his mouth. All the signs were there that he wasn't in the mood to be messed with.

But, as little brothers were wont to do, Clint ignored all that and went for the jab. "So," he said as he sidled up next to Barney, "good goodbye?"

"Oh, shut up, Clint," Barney grumbled, his smile dropping fast.

"Long goodbye?" Clint pressed.

"Shut _up_, Clint."

"I think, if you've settled business for now, it's probably time to feed your little brother before he starts chewing on whatever's closest to him," K said before Clint could get going.

Barney snickered and nodded. "Feral child that he is."

"Hey," Clint said.

"Oh, I should take offense to that," K said loftily.

"Didn't mean _your _kind of feral, Mom, but it was funny, you gotta admit," Barney said, grinning wider.

"I'm _not _— I'm not even _that _kind of feral!" Clint insisted.

"The kind that can't put his clothes on right or speak in sentences? Sure you are."

"Glass houses, non-blond Barton," K said, reaching out to brush his hair the wrong way.

"What? I talk goodly," Barney said, grinning somehow even wider down at K.

"Passable," she said. "Though it should be 'speak' or absolutely anything other than 'goodly,' you ridiculous little corn-pone."

"Oh, right," Barney said, nodding semi-seriously. "I speak bad-notly."

"_Det är bra att du är vacker_," K said.

"Not that pretty," Clint said under his breath.

"Passable, though," K replied as she squeezed Clint's shoulder.

Clint shrugged. "Only because he looks so much like me."

"Small miracles," she agreed, then tipped her head for Barney to catch up. "I'll leave it between you on where we go next. The only thing I know for sure is that you'll likely be looking for something _sweet_."

"Hot chocolate and peppermint sticks," Barney said after a moment's thought. "Please."

"Then, Clint, I guess it's up to you to pick dinner."

"Umm… what about that place with the volcano wings?"

"Works for me," K said, then turned to Barney. "You ready to burn your face off?"

"If it's the only way Clint can feel like he's better-looking than me…"

K sighed dramatically, matching both of them for their level. "You're _both _pretty. Stop that."

"Can't," Barney said.

"It's hard-wired," Clint agreed.

"You're both lucky I love you so much."

"Love you too," the boys chorused back to her.

The three of them headed off to get dinner — and the hot chocolate — but when they were done and they were nearly back to the car, K whistled shrilly and tossed the keys to Barney. "You're up."

Barney stared at the keys. "I'm what?" he asked at the same time Clint said, "He's what?"

"We'll stay in the parking lot, but it's time you learned how to drive. Shift anyhow," K said. "And don't worry; Logan said he had to re-do the clutch soon anyhow. So … you're up."

Barney looked like Christmas had come early as he climbed into the driver's seat, his eyes wide as he put his hands on the wheel and then looked over at K, grinning madly. "You're totally sure? I mean, last time I drove your car, I totally wrecked the gears."

"Yeah, I'm not worried about it," she promised. "And you might have been under a little stress last time."

"Yeah, just a little," Barney said, making a face as he thought of how he'd jackrabbited several times on his drive to find Logan and stop Creed. He shook his head. "This is totally different, though. No jerks, just me and my brother and my mom."

"So you'll do great," she said. "Just relax and try not to kill any guard rails or light posts."

"Which he will," Clint put in from the back seat, making a dramatic show of strapping himself in.

"Then it's a good thing Logan's ride is steel reinforced," K said. "Whenever you're ready — don't let him get in your head." As soon as she coached him through getting the seat in the right spot for his longer legs, she walked him through the basics. "It's not hard," K promised. "Just work on first gear to start. Keep the clutch in, give it a little gas, and gently feather off the clutch."

It took two tries before Barney got that far without either stalling out or lurching forward, and then it was clear he didn't know what to do and he was afraid to hit the gas or to try and back off — mostly because K was encouraging him to 'keep it steady' and trying to guide him through feeling _when _he needed to use the clutch, gas, or brake. And every time they'd start off, it would be with a good lurch … not just from the take off, but when he got bold and decided to try shifting to second, too.

Of course, that meant quicker speeds — and faster turns — and more anxiety about when to use the clutch. At that point, his coach was laughing hard enough that she was of no use whatsoever. "You've got it; you do," she laughed, holding her stomach. "Try not to crash land."

She was the only one out of the three that picked up when she needed to brace herself for a lurch or a short distance stop, laughing all the while until Barney finally _got _it. It was all at once, and though it wasn't the easiest on the _engine_, he did figure out the clutch without launching his passengers or himself toward the dash. "Good, now feather with the gas, too," K said, wiping her eyes. "And if you take your foot off the gas, just press the clutch in. That'll buy you time anyhow."

Barney _thought _he had it down — and it was getting smoother — until he barked the tires in third and K broke down laughing all over again. "Was that too much?" Barney asked through a grin.

"No, no — do that _every time _in _every gear_," K laughed. "Bonus points for reverse."

"She's trying to test my healing when you send me flying into next week," Clint put in helpfully, though he was laughing as well.

"Don't listen to him," K said. "More peel outs."

"Mom says more peel outs," Barney called to Clint.

"Mom heals better," Clint called back.

"He needs the practice!" K defended. "How else will he win drag races at stop lights?"

"Lipstick," Clint said without missing a beat, and Barney just about swallowed his own tongue with the noise he made.

The boys kept picking on each other back and forth for the rest of Barney's lesson, building up to an excellent mood until they finally stopped so K and Barney could switch places and, as Clint put it, get home safely.

"Such a weak stomach," K teased. "I'm sure Barney will be dying to go when _you _learn."

"I don't heal," Barney said without missing a beat. "I can't go."

"Chicken," K shot back before Clint could even get there, and Clint simply gestured toward K with one hand as if to say "what she said."

"Okay, fine," Barney said. "But only so I can rub it in when he takes an age and a half to get gear shifting down."

"I dunno," K said as she fixed the seat. "He was pretty fast with archery …"

Clint grinned triumphantly. "Besides," he sang out when Barney looked like he would argue, "I've got a big brother to watch make all the mistakes first."

"I think you mean you get to learn from me when I do it _right_."

K shook her head and put it into gear to get moving. They still had a way to go before they set up camp again, and fun as it was to play in the parking lot, it was time to move.


	7. Baby's First Kidnapping

**Chapter 7: Baby's First Kidnapping**

K had driven to the end of the lot and just turned to head for the road when a big, black SUV pulled across the entire exit, blocking them from even going around. She narrowed her eyes and didn't say a word as she threw the car in reverse and squealed the tires backward, slamming it into first as she whipped the front end around, drifting the car until it was facing the other way. The tires were smoking before they caught, and they rushed to the far end of the lot to try that exit — only to stop short at the same results. And by that time, more SUV's, vans, and larger vehicles were lining the edges of the lot beyond the guard rails, blocking them all the way around.

"Mom," Clint said quietly, but he didn't say anything else. He knew how much trouble they were in, and he couldn't quite hide his fear when he knew who they were likely dealing with.

"Hit your button," she said, throwing it into reverse again. She might not have been able to get them _out_, but she figured she'd take a few out while they could. Or that was the plan until the armed troops came out with the rifles raised. She swore under her breath but didn't take her focus off of the soldiers around them. "Okay. So. Barney, you know how to drive now. Tell the guys this was Army."

She put the car in neutral — not park — and left it running, though she pulled the parking brake. "Don't forget to release the lever before you _get out_," K instructed before she gave them both a tight smile and then slipped out of the car.

"What about you?" Barney asked, though he was automatically climbing into the driver's seat — and couldn't believe that he kept getting driving lessons the hard way.

"I'm going to try cooperating," she said. "Maybe they'll leave you two alone."

"_Mom_," Clint breathed out.

"It's the only play I've got that can keep you two out," she said. "And the guys will come looking if you can tell them _who _it was. Carol has everything. She'll lead the charge."

Barney was nodding even though Clint was shaking his head. "I'll get Logan, too," Barney promised.

"Pretty sure he'd come looking without direction. Even if he shouldn't," K said before she winked at them and started toward the soldiers — hands up at shoulder height, palms to them. She walked slowly, ignoring the sounds of rifles cocking around her, and when she was halfway between the car with the kids and the soldiers, the shouting really started up. It was hard to hear what exactly was being said with a dozen guys or more shouting on top of each other, but K could at least decipher what was going on. She stopped, then slowly turned in a circle before a couple dozen armed soldiers came up on her, rifles up and shouting more orders. In a matter of a few moments, she went from standing to kneeling to on her stomach, the whole while keeping her hands in view as the soldiers circled closer, fingers on the trigger every step of the way.

There were clearly conflicting orders — easy even for the boys to hear where they were — as several soldiers were shouting for her not to move while others were telling her what they wanted her to do. So, K did the only thing that made sense to her and stayed quiet, not moving until one of the soldiers came close enough to shove the muzzle of the rifle against the back of her head, pushing her into the concrete. That was the one she listened to as he shouted for her to cooperate as one of the others yanked her arms behind her back and cuffed her with something that hummed. A moment later, the same soldier was turning out her pockets, tossing anything she had in them in a small pile just out of sight. Wallet, cash, keys … a pack of gum, and the panic buttons. They even went so far as to yank her boots off and toss them into the pile as well before one of them dragged her to her feet backward and another stepped forward to hold her other arm as the general made his appearance.

Her attention was drawn as one of the soldiers set fire to her things, and the instant she took her focus off of the men around her, _someone _took it as a threat and emptied half a clip into her torso.

And _that _was too much for either of the boys to ignore. Clint and Barney didn't even need to say anything to each other before Barney gunned it, at first aiming to get out and then, when the soldiers seemed to think the vehicle was a threat, aiming toward K, figuring he could give her some cover to heal while Clint pulled her into the car.

It was about as good of a plan as they were going to get when the soldiers around them were already trigger-happy and nervy. Barney _did _make it to K, but as soon as he slowed down close to her and the soldiers nearest her, several other men started shouting orders for him to stop or they'd shoot up the car.

"Barn…" Clint swallowed as he looked at how surrounded they were. "This looks bad."

"No kidding," Barney said — and he would have pulled off a perfectly dry delivery if he wasn't obviously scared, his hands tight on the steering wheel as he tried to figure out what to do. K had told them to get out, but they hadn't been _able _to in the first place… and now they were in trouble too. "You still got your panic button?"

"Yeah, why?"

"Think you can keep it hidden?"

"Um… against the Army?"

"You could always play it like we used to with the bad fosters. You're _close to _young enough to be wide-eyed, right?"

"You know these guys aren't the same level as the guys we dealt with as kids, right?"

"Yeah, but remember how you redirected those department guys at the circus by crying?"

"I was also seven."

"Hey, it's worth a shot."

Clint sighed and scrubbed a hand over his face, but he also could see the soldiers squaring up and knew they didn't have any _good _options, so he did his best to look scared and innocent — and he was very successful at _one _of those, anyway. He really was scared as they got out of the car with their hands up.

He was scared for Barney, too, because he might have been young enough to maybe get some sympathy from the Army (not from the department, though, he knew) but Barney was fifteen and mean. He was in trouble; Clint just knew it.

"Don't shoot!" Barney said, his hands high — but the soldiers were already moving in on him, considering he was the _driver_.

But that was really just a sign of how inexperienced Barney was. Clint watched in horror as his big brother got swamped and restrained, and he saw the moment Barney went from defiant to panicked. Barney hadn't even been kidnapped like this. He'd heard stories, though, and he was smart enough to know getting dragged away by guys in uniform like this was _so far beyond bad_.

Clint swore and fought back, but he was restrained and subdued soon enough too, which was how both Barton boys found themselves being put in separate vehicles. Three different transports for three different prisoners — all of them worried about each other, especially since both boys had been searched and they weren't sure if the X-Men or Avengers would be able to _find _them.

* * *

Barney was freaking out.

He'd gotten used to looking over his shoulder and looking out for his little brother. He'd stood up to abusers and drunks. He'd spent his winters in a school that was constantly being targeted by genocidal maniacs. But he'd never faced anything like _this_.

No one had ever dragged him off in a military vehicle. No one had ever handcuffed him. He'd had guns pointed at him before, but other than when he'd dealt with Creed alongside Logan, he'd never been in _so much trouble_.

The soldiers were all jumpy. Barney figured that was because they were dealing with K, and they knew she could take them down with both hands and a foot tied behind her back. He and Clint were with K — she was their mom — so these guys had every reason to treat him like a major threat.

Except he wasn't like Clint and K. He couldn't heal. He'd never _done _this. And he was surprised by how much he couldn't get his terror under control. He'd always thought he'd be okay after being a big brother to Clint and taking the hits for him. This… was _not _the same.

Eventually, he was manhandled out of the vehicle, and he wound up trying in vain to spot Clint or K. That was only serving to make him panic more, of course. His brother and his new mom had been through _way _too much already; not knowing what was happening to them was only making his imagination go wild. And he had a pretty vivid imagination, too.

He didn't get any explanation before he was taken to what had to be a cell and locked in, left to his own thoughts and the overly loud heartbeat in his ears. Or, at least, he thought it was a heartbeat until he realized that what he was actually hearing was something else. Something _big_, way deeper in the building.

Barney was suddenly very sure he didn't want to know what that noise was.

"If you're smart," the guard nearest him said. "You'll just be quiet and do as you're told, kid."

"Not really known for being smart," Barney said almost automatically; it was an old answer.

"You might want to be anyhow."

"Right." Barney swallowed and glanced around the cell. "So.. you gonna read me my rights or what?"

"Nobody locked up here has any rights to be read, kid. Just keep your head down."

Barney narrowed his eyes at that but leaned against the wall of the cell all the same. He… wasn't very good at keeping his head down, but he was scared enough to try it. At least until he knew what the heck was going _on_.

He waited until the suspense had him pacing, and then he waited some more, spending every second convinced that something terrible was happening to Clint and K. Probably some new evil scientist or something. They called down the _worst _kind of trouble.

And then he heard the unmistakable sound of his little brother swearing in English and Swedish and even some Korean that Katie had taught him in giggled secrets.

Barney couldn't see far past his cell, but from what he could see when he strained, Clint was swearing and just generally being a pill for the guards trying to lead him down the hall. Barney wasn't sure if they were just taking Clint to a cell like his or taking him somewhere worse, but he was, at least, reassured to see Clint doing well enough to be that creative with his swearing. It was when Clint was _quiet _that it was time to worry.

And hey, it looked like they were headed his way, so maybe he'd at least know where _one _of his family members was while they were stuck there until one of the teams could get them out.

"...you didn't even know were physically possible to _have _your foot," Clint was saying as the guards dragged him forward. He was doing the exact opposite of keeping his head down, drawing attention from everyone around them and doing a good job of forcing the guards to work harder by being dead weight they had to drag.

Which was all the encouragement Barney needed to join Clint's crusade to annoy the guards.

"Hey, you're staying at this hotel too?" he called out to Clint.

Clint stopped fighting — just for a moment — and then grinned as he called back, "Apparently. I'm gonna run up a room service bill and then dine and dash, though. They've got _terrible _bellhops."

"Room service sucks, though," Barney said.

"Yeah, you try it out?"

"Got an order of 'stay quiet' and a side of 'you have no rights despite being an American citizen,'" Barney said, shooting a pointed glare at the guard who'd told him to keep his head down.

"Oh, you got _words_?" Clint was getting closer now, so Barney could see his wide-eyed look of pretended shock. "I got glares and threats. Jealous."

"Oh, I got glares too."

"They're complimentary. Come with the place."

"You both need to keep it quiet," the guard who had tried to advise Barney said.

"What, I can't talk to my own brother? Jeez," Barney said, rolling his eyes.

"You two really can't take a hint, can you?" The guy said, leaning toward Barney and lowering his voice. "Wait. Just wait."

Barney's every instinct said to screw the rules, but hey, _one _person in this place was being helpful, might as well at least try that out for size. "Fine," he said with a shrug.

Clint took his lead from Barney, if only because it was hard to keep up a back and forth with only one half of their duo, and the two of them had a whole conversation in dry expressions instead as the guards let Clint into Barney's cell.

In a second, Clint ran over and hugged Barney, then stepped back and started to sign furiously. _They took my button when they looked me over. We're gonna have to wait for Dad to realize something happened, and then he'll find us. Don't let them do anything permanent, okay?_

_Like healing? These aren't those guys._

_They're working with those guys. _Clint bit his lip, glancing toward the door. _They're letting us see each other. That usually means a carrot or stick. At least that's how this usually goes._

_Trying to analyze the situation?_

_That's what I'm supposed to be learning to do, right? Plus, I've got experience. _

_Yeah, I hate that experience, you know that?_

_Me too._

_Do you know what they want? _Barney asked. He didn't realize he was putting himself between Clint and the guards, but he was already falling back into the same patterns he and Clint had established growing up together.

_They haven't told me yet. But they must want something, _Clint said. _They probably want us to get Mom to behave. That's happened before._

_With Sinister, _Barney finished for him, nodding along; he still remembered the stories Clint had told after all that, especially since Clint had had nightmares about Sinister ever since. He _still _had those nightmares, too.

Clint had his arms crossed and was holding onto his elbows. _Yeah. With Sinister. _

Barney frowned when he saw how nervy Clint was, then bumped shoulders with him in an attempt to pull his attention into the present. _Hey, this isn't Sinister._

_I know, _Clint replied, though he was still holding his arms tight to himself.

_And you know Mom is going to escape soon and make them all regret grabbing us._

At that, Clint finally cracked a smirk. _True._

_These guys aren't at the same level as Sinister or the department, _Barney reasoned. _As much as I hate to agree with that guard, if we keep our heads down, Mom will have us out in no time. _

Clint nodded. _It's what happens while we wait that scares me, _he admitted.

Barney didn't admit that he was worried about the same thing, because he didn't want to freak Clint out — especially because the guards were stepping back into the room to separate the boys again. Instead, what Barney said was, "Give 'em hell, Clint."

"Don't I always?" Clint said — proving the point by already making it hard for the guards to manhandle him.


	8. Who's Controlling Who?

**Chapter 8: Who's Controlling Who?**

At that point, the guards were content to let Barney stay in his cell, but for Clint, they still had other plans, taking him deeper into the place, where the rumbling sound was easier to comprehend as roars and thuds. He couldn't identify _what _was roaring when it was still far below him, but that didn't exactly make him feel any better about the situation.

Especially not when they got far enough down the hall that he could see his mom behind one of the cell doors — still healing from how much she'd been shot when they took her in.

"Mom," Clint breathed out, then tried it again a little louder, really hoping that she was more alright than she looked.

"Don't waste your time, kid," one of the guards said, so Clint kicked him as hard as he could from the angle he was being pushed along.

"What did you losers do to her?" he demanded.

"You're not the one asking questions or making demands, kid."

"Like hell I'm not!" Clint twisted and dropped and did everything he could to be a pain. "Let me see my _mom_!"

"No," the other guard said, tightening his grip on Clint so he couldn't move as much. "And she'll stay right where she is in that dampener. If you're lucky, you'll get to see her before she's transferred to a Department H facility."

Clint was shaking his head hard by then. "You can't give her to _them_; they're the _bad guys_. I already _explained this_ to your idiot boss!"

"You're the one siding with a known terrorist and fugitive—"

"Oh, wow, it's like talking to a brick wall."

"I'm not going to argue with you, kiddo. I'm sure she's told you all kinds of things to explain away why she was killing people like me that were just doing their jobs."

"Maybe you should ask your _buddies _in Department H who was ordering the hits," Clint shot back angrily.

"I don't have any buddies in Department H, kid," the guard said wearily. "I'm just doing my job — and you're just being belligerent."

"Being belligerent is _my _job," Clint insisted, though by that time, the guards were simply ignoring him, leading him past his mom toward the loud noises, deeper and deeper until Clint did, in fact, recognize the voice.

It was the Hulk.

Clint's eyes were wide, and he stopped fighting or even back-talking as he and the guards went deeper and deeper into the facility. The walls were starting to shake from the force of the Hulk trying to break out, and this time, without being able to see the situation, Clint was actually scared. He didn't want to get hurt in the collateral damage of a Hulk escape, even if he'd heal and even if he and the Hulk were on good terms. Actually, he _especially _didn't want to get hurt if that happened, because then the Hulk would be upset on his behalf.

Outside of a massively reinforced cell, a pair of differently-uniformed guys was waiting for them, which was when Clint realized this really was as bad as he was afraid it would be.

"We've got it from here," one of them told Clint's assigned guards.

Clint actually felt the guards hesitate, because they both held onto him a little tighter, but then, they seemed to relax a little bit more than normal as they stepped back and let each of the new guards take hold of Clint to push him forward.

So yeah, something screwy was going on.

Clint's original guards were well out of earshot when the new guys turned to Clint and gestured toward the vibrating walls that had just absorbed another hit. "Make him stop."

Clint blinked, his lips parted. "...what?"

"For some reason, he listens to you," the first guard said.

"Probably some baser instinct," muttered the second. "Considering who his parents are — animals that recognize each other."

Clint had heard his mom and dad being referred to that way, but somehow, it stung just as much to be on the receiving end of that kind of talk — which was itself a surprise, since he normally didn't care as much if _he _was getting flack. His mom's good work to build his own self-esteem suddenly meant he cared about being torn down like that. "_Hey_."

The guards ignored him. "We'll start with something simple. Make him stop. Even you can understand commands like that, can't you?" When Clint glared, he smirked. "We'll start working on more complicated commands and controls down the line."

"Are you serious?" Clint stared at him. "He's my _friend_. He's not — he's not some _pet_ or something. I'm not _in charge of him_."

"That part's true enough; you'll just be relaying orders."

Clint shook his head at that. "No way. I'm not working for you losers. I'm not helping you make _him _work for you either."

"Mm." The first guard turned to his partner. "You have the incident report drawn up?"

The second guard nodded. "Assault with a deadly weapon. Vehicle. Only option was to shoot the driver and stop the car. The two healers survived, but the teenage driver…"

Clint looked green. "Stop it," he said without thinking. "What are you talking about? Stop it!"

"Or what?" The first guard chuckled. "You'll yell at us some more?"

"You don't even know if it'll work," Clint said breathlessly — which was about when General Ross came down to see what the Hulk situation was. The General seemed surprised to see Clint so _close_ to the cell, especially when Clint was understandably terrified (albeit for his brother, not necessarily of the Hulk).

"It'll work," the second guard said flatly. "You've already done it."

"Yeah, when we were _having fun_. If I try to _make _him… I mean, what if he decides I'm with you? He's not _stupid_; he's gonna figure out I'm doing what _you _say!" Clint was desperate, trying to find a way out that wouldn't hurt Barney.

"You'll heal."

"Hold on a minute," Ross cut in. "That's not the kind of thing _our _military tolerates. We don't use _children_."

"I tried to tell you—" Clint started to say, but the first guy cut him off.

"You saw the same footage we did, General. You wanted help containing the Hulk? You need to think outside the box."

"I didn't authorize kidnapping a _child _to have anything to do with the Hulk," Ross shouted back.

(Clint very nearly argued that he wasn't a child, but hey, it was nice to have the general backing him up, so he didn't.)

"Incidental catch," the guard said. "He was with his mother. We just saw the opportunity."

"The very definition of an _incidental catch _is one you didn't mean to get — but you _targeted _this kid." Ross gestured wildly. "The woman isn't a viable asset for now _anyhow_. You know that. It's too big a risk."

"She will be," the second guard replied. "And in the meantime, her kid can _direct _the Hulk. You saw it."

"_No one _wants to get a handle on the Hulk more than I do," Ross said. "But you are willfully insisting on doing the same things that got hundreds of _good men _killed."

The first guard grinned crookedly. "That's the beauty of it, General. The kid heals like his mom. No necks to risk."

It was clear that Ross was under the impression that the man in front of him was far stupider than he'd initially thought. "That doesn't change the fact that you are _trying to utilize a child_!"

"Mutant," the second guard put in.

"Bite me," Clint snapped.

"Don't push your luck," the second guard shot right back, glaring daggers at Clint — so Clint bit him, resulting in a very quick fight until Clint was pinned and snarling out every swear word he knew.

Very suddenly, the tone shifted with the general. "Do as you're told," Ross said toward Clint. "This will all go easier if you learn quickly to follow orders."

Clint looked away from the guard he was trying to kick toward Ross with an open look of disbelief. "What are you even talking about?"

"You need to tell the Hulk to back off," Ross said. "And you need to do it before I lose my patience and do something with your brother or mom." He tipped his chin down. "Do I make myself clear?"

Clint blinked a few times, his jaw slightly dropped, before he nodded quietly. "Uh-huh," he said, though he was trying to figure out what he'd _missed _that made the general switch sides so quickly.

Maybe he needed to ask Jean to look around when the X-Men came to get them. Which they would. Because Jean had told him after the last snatch job that she was _this _close to burning some creeps to a crisp. Which Clint thought sounded like a great idea.

With that, the guards let him into the _huge _area where the Hulk was being held — and where he was screaming and stomping and generally being as terrifying as the Hulk was able to be. Clint froze in the doorway, suddenly aware of how much smaller he was than the Hulk. It was easier to be scared of the guy in close quarters than it had been when they were racing each other trying to smash more bad guys.

Clint heard the door close behind him and swallowed, edging around the room to see if he could get in the Hulk's line of sight. A few times, an angry roar or a swinging fist or foot was too loud or too close for comfort, and he froze, cringing. He was being too quiet. He needed to catch the Hulk's attention when the big guy was focused the other way and trying to break free.

"Hey," Clint said, though it was too quiet and bubbled in his throat. He swallowed hard and tried again. "Hey, uh, fancy seeing you here," he said, which sounded very stupid when it came out of his mouth.

Still, the way the cell was built, even Clint's feeble attempt at sounding brave echoed slightly, just enough that the Hulk heard it and turned Clint's way, his chest heaving from the effort of trying to break out and his gaze more manic than Clint had seen it before — but Clint did, at least, see recognition there too.

So he could work with that.

Maybe.

He cleared his throat, unconsciously moving so his weight shifted from one foot to the other. "I… I, um, hi." He waved with one hand. "I got caught too. You okay?"

That single question seemed to get the Hulk's attention, and suddenly, Clint found himself being almost studied by massive, green eyes. "Hawk got caught," Hulk said in a rumble, his angry scowl turning into a deep frown.

Clint nodded. "Yeah. Me and my brother and my mom. Not fun, huh?"

The Hulk shook his head, still watching Clint carefully.

"So, uh." Clint cleared his throat and shifted nervously. "So, uh, if you could not bring the place down on me and my family, I'd really, really appreciate it. I know it totally sucks, though, right?" He gestured around the cell. "Worst amenities in New York."

The Hulk snorted. "You said it," he said, then gritted his teeth and let out a roar that sounded more hurt than angry.

Initially, Clint had backed up against the wall, but when he saw the way Hulk was shaking his head like he was trying to dispel whatever lingering hurt was still clinging to him, Clint took a step forward again. "Hey, what's wrong?" he asked. "How the heck did they hurt _you_?" He tried not to sound like he was scared, but, well, he was. For oh so many reasons.

The Hulk shook his head again. "Head hurt."

Clint frowned and glanced back toward the door, then jumped when the Hulk banged his head on the wall. "Woah, hey, maybe not?" he said, rushing forward, both hands out. "Don't hurt yourself worse!"

The Hulk let out a gravelly sound and hit his head again.

"Oookay." Clint ran around the Hulk again. "Hey. Something screwy is going on here, you know?" he said. "I'm pretty sure someone is — I think maybe a telepath. Something controlling. Something like that." When the Hulk shook his head hard again, he got even closer. "I'm pretty sure someone's controlling that general."

That finally got the Hulk to pay Clint more attention again. "Ross," he practically growled like a curse.

Clint nodded. "Yep. That guy." He gestured toward the door. "He was mad the bad guys caught me cuz I'm a kid. Next thing I know, he's all 'do as you're told, you pawn'." Clint puffed his chest out and even did a passable imitation of Ross's speech patterns.

Hulk stopped what he was doing and even let out a sharp laugh. "Yellow Hawk is funny."

Clint grinned outright. "I do my best."

The Hulk smiled wider and crouched closer to Clint. "Yellow Hawk come with Hulk. Get out. Hulk smash more bad guys than Yellow Hawk."

Clint's smile dropped fast. "I'd really like to prove you wrong, but…" He looked toward the door. "But my mom and my brother…"

The Hulk frowned as he watched Clint. "Yellow Hawk scared?"

Clint nodded. And then, without even thinking about it, he rushed forward and did his best attempt at a hug at the Hulk's chest level. He was shaking and worried his brother wasn't going to live through this and scared out of his mind that the department was going to use him up like they did his mom… and it was weird, but the Hulk was safer than all of that out there.

The Hulk seemed downright surprised by the gesture and looked around the room as if someone would help him piece together why this small boy had attached to him. Then, awkwardly, he put a hand around Clint. "It's okay," he rumbled.

Clint nodded into his chest but didn't look up for a long time. When he did, his eyes were shining. "My brother doesn't have any powers," he whispered. "They're going to kill him if you and me don't do what they say."

Hulk narrowed his eyes and huffed angrily. "We smash them first."

"Please don't," Clint whispered.

The Hulk sighed, but he had never had to face a crying little boy who _cared _about him before. He was used to kids crying because they were scared of him. This was new.

And it was that simple fact — the newness of the situation — that made the Hulk nod his agreement.


End file.
